Today I am going to talk to you about bonding, believability, credibility. How to get it, and translate it into blockbuster sales in one fell swoop.
But before I get cranked up on today’s post, I want to discuss a few items of interest. First, today’s post picks up where we left of yesterday.
So if you haven’t read Entrepreneurial Success In A Sentence yet – you should click on over to it and read it first.
Second, did you get a chance to read over all the comments fellow readers contributed and witness the collective genius of our community?
What’s that? You say you did catch all that? You say you read all the comments and you noticed the very same fact?
GOOD! GOOD! GOOD!
Now listen: did you also notice Christopher Vogelmann’s comment?
No need to flip back, I’ll tell you what he said: “Greater Rapport = Greater Profits”
More about that later.
Did you also read the rather insightful comments concerning the common (yet false) perception that the problems people experience they believe are unique to them?
Once again, no need to flip back I’ve chosen a few to share with you here…
“I think many people consider their troubles, struggles, and failings to be most personal, and that is very human, and common to all” -kel
“…the older I’ve gotten I have come to the realization that I am not (unique). My problems, desires, wishes, aspirations, dilemmas, issues, set backs, insecurities, losses, tribulations, health issues and loves are not unique. I’ve discovered that we all go through the nearly identical issues at some time during our lives, some sooner or later than others.” -Orvel
“Every businessman I know has told me more than once that there business is different, with unique problems not easily understood by outsiders. On a personal level they honestly believe that.” -Randy
“…as we grow up we are programmed not to talk about our problems and hence the same situations/challenges (that all human beings face) become personal.” – Lalitha Brahma
“I’ve come to realize that the struggles I face, the ones that i think are unique to me, are actually pretty commonplace.” -Chestin Salisbury
“Everyone thinks that their problems are unique. They take them in, internalize them and fester on them. They must be unique because if they weren’t they could just find out what someone else did to fix it and do that.” – Eric
I couldn’t of said it better myself.
Next. Did you happen to notice the shrewd comments about the agonizing isolation our problems can cause us?
You say you did? Well, let me pick just a few for the other’s who might have missed them…
“It’s crazy how we believe we are the only one with the deep dark struggle” -Paul Cooley
“Because most people are uncomfortable talking openly about their most deeply personal struggles, we rarely hear people talking about the things that are most personal to us” -Antone Roundy
“Our problems are much more common than what we believe. In fact we believe they are pretty unique.” – Kayvon
“At the time, I felt SO alone in my struggles, and yet now i Know that I most certainly wasn’t the only one out there trying to make the switch… It’s funny how we do that as humans, isn’t it? We hole up when we’re scared or in pain of some sort and feel like no else in the world shares our pain.” – Jennifer McCay
You did catch all that? Wonderful. I knew you would.
After all, you are one of my readers and my readers are the sharpest people (true) marketing online today.
And because you’re so clever, you most certainly, realized this profound truth…
Like these intelligent commenters…
“…as we open up and bare our souls to others… surprisingly… there are occasionally others who say ‘HEY!! THAT’S MY STORY TOO!! THAT’S EXACTLY HOW I FEEL!!’” -Will Kenderdine
“…I think it’s that journey that we all have in common. And i guess when thinking about empathizing with your customers, it’s those experiences from that journey that we all have in common, and that’s what we can tap into when interacting with our customers.” -Gerard
“…my take on the sentence is that even through we all feel that our problems are unique to us, they are in fact a problem that everyone faces and if you can solve your problem and move yourself closer to your goal, then you have in face created a solution that millions of others also have and will gladly pay money for or give their attention to.” – Graeme McLeish
“…by participating in really open and intense ‘group therapy’ (for years, and years, and years) is that everyone’s ‘problems’ are the same, we lose sight of that fact when the problems are our own, and therefore they look insurmountable. It is always easier to see a logical and reasonable solution to someone else’s problem.” – Stafford “Doc” Williamson
“I can see how marketing to these personal fears and insecurities would give you a leveraged advantage.” – Colin
“it means ‘how do I make a pearl out of my own issue and show others how to do it too?’ It also points to seeing that what you are passionate about, others will be too, if you trust and believe in your passion. First, you must recognize your passion (which is intimately connected with your ‘problem’ or ‘challenge’ or whatever it is that you are interested in solving) – Lil
“Second, you must open yourslef up to finding a creative way to turn it into a service that makes the world a better place. No doubt, others have your same passion/problem/challenge.” – Lil
Well done! All in all, you guys really nailed the issues yesterday and provided tons of great insights.
O.K., that’s enough back-slapping.
Let’s dive into the subject of today’s post which is the direct relationship between EMPATHY and PROFITS.
If you’re familiar with my work, you know I am huge fan of Peter Drucker. And one of my favorite quotes (of his) is “The goal of marketing is to make selling superfluous”
You see, there’s a difference between Marketing and Selling. And when done correctly Marketing precedes Selling.
Better yet, when you marketing is effective (and comes first), your selling is a lot more profitable.
It’s a matter of timing. Marketing is like seduction.
(for the sake of simplicity, in this example – we’ll assume you’re a heterosexual man)
If you ask a woman to go to bed with you (the sales question), whether or not she says “yes” is largely a matter of WHEN you ask her . If you ask her immediately, as soon as you’ve been introduced, most likely she will think you are a creep and tell you to get lost.
However, if you wait a while, wait until she gets to know you a little, wait until you’ve wined and dined her a few times, wait until she’s had a chance to warm up to you, to discover that you are, indeed, a fine fellow , (which is the one of the goals of your marketing) then, my friend, your chances of getting a “yes” for an answer are much, much better.
So it is with online marketing. If you take the trouble to warm up your prospect, to seduce her a little before you pop the big question (“will you buy my stuff?”) then your closing rate will be much, much higher.
Really. This is the Numero Uno mistake made online today. Think about it: What does it matter how sparkling your copy, how compelling your offer, or how attractive your price if your prospect doesn’t trust and believe you?
You know, this simple truth seems to me to be so self-evident that I feel a bit silly being redundant about it.
But you know what? I’d rather be redundant than bankrupt and bankrupt is where a lot of internet marketers have wound up because of a failure to grasp this simple and “obvious” concept.
So, now that you know the most successful marketers appear likable, honest and trustworthy…Wouldn’t you like to know how to make certain you appear that way (and I pray to God you really are that way too)?
How about if I told you it would bond your readers to you like nothing you’ve ever seen before, would you be even more interested to find out how?
It’s actually quite simple, really. Although, make-no-mistake, it isn’t easy to do (but I can show you how – if you ask).
All you have to do is articulate your prospects problems better than they have ever done.
Think about it – have you ever had a chronic problem, pain or challenge that you struggled with? Of course, you have, we all do, right?
Well, think back for a second and see if you can remember a time when you met someone who totally understood your challenge – so much so when they explained your problem back to you, you were excited because this person truly understood what you were experiencing and feeling.
You were like “Finally! Someone who understands what it’s like to be me!”
Think about how your feeling shifted about that person who “got-it.”
Do you know what else usually happens in the mind of your prospects – when they feel as if you “got-it”?
Pay close attention here, this is real important…
When an expert describes your problem better than you can – you automatically assume they also have a way to solve it!
It’s critical to remember this: Your prospects are NOT currently craving more information (we’re already overloaded) . What they crave more than anything else is ADVICE. And before anyone considers paying for advice (or buying the physical product you advise) they have to feel that you understand them. You need to understand who they are, and the situation they’re in.
Famed copywriter John Carlton says, “Most people feel misunderstood, and their dammed pissed off about it.” I tend to agree with John on this.
That’s why the ability to put down in words what your prospects are struggling with is so powerful.
Now, the good news is this actually easier to do than you might imagine. The reason – most people don’t think deeply about their problems to be able to clearly express them.
Which means you definitely have the opportunity to express your prospects’ problems better than they can if you spend enough time thinking about those problems and play around on how best to articulate it.
This is immensely easier to do if you are a member of the market you want to market to. For example, way back when I wrote the Internet Business Manifesto, the frustration, problems and struggles I highlighted came from personal experience.
Did it work?
I’d say so. That report generated over 35,000 opt-ins (mostly by it going viral much more so then through the few jv partners i had) and brought back $109 per opt-in in immediate sales. In case you’re fuzzy at math, that’s $3,815,000.
O.K., that’s why I was so excited when I saw Christopher Vogelmann’s comment “Greater Rapport = Greater Profit.” Because he’s spot on!
That wraps up today’s lesson. Sorry it was longer than I thought it would be. Tomorrow I’ll do my best to condense it.
Here’s what I need you to do next: (remember this is a dialogue, not a monologue)
Answer these two questions in the comments section below
1. Tell me your biggest AHA from today. What was the most valuable nugget you from today’s post?
2. Based on what I laid out for you today – what would you like me to help you with tomorrow?
And then (as a favor to me) please retweet this post (you’ll find the button to the right of the headline).
Till tomorrow (remember, I’m posting here every morning at 10 a.m.)….
To greater profits and beyond,
Rich Schefren
****THIS BLOG POST IS CONTINUED IN THE NEXT INSTALLMENT – WHICH CAN BE FOUND BY CLICKING HERE****
Link to this post: If you found this page useful, consider linking to Honest Online Business Tip: Greater Empathy = Greater Rapport = Greater Profits ...
I think it is a good post. Would it be good if I act like I know what I’m talking about when I write to my prospect? Like just pretend to know their frustrations. I just want to make money online I don’t really want to worry about feelings and stuff.
Hey Jason… I just wanted you to read a quote:
“I just want to make money online I don’t really want to worry about feelings and stuff.”
That’s is your mindset… so then I take it that your products are sooo great that I can only buy from you???
Geez man, their are over 1.2billion people online today w/ 87K everyday coming aboard. How can all those people hear you when all you care about is “I just want to make money online I don’t really want to worry about feelings and stuff.”
Maybe you should reconsider you attitude towards making money? & stuff…
Loyd La Rue
http://twitter.com/LoydLarue
Loyd is absolutely right. Your “money is everything” will show through all your fancy work. At that point, people will turn off, and go somewhere else. At best, like spam, you will fool a few, but not the majority. What you are doing, is akin to chasing some pigs into a forest, and then burning it down, for a roast pork dinner. You are sacrificing all future possible sales, for the sake of a few today. That’s just plain dumb.
Assuming that you want to continue making sales, and money, you must make sure people want to do business with you. Once you offend them, you have a ten times harder struggle to get them back. I guarantee that a “I’m only in this to see how much I can make,” attitude will offend. You have to care about the customer, and want to solve their problems. If you don’t, you will have abysmal sales, and go under. That can’t be what you want.
lol. you’re funny.
shouldn’t you consider some other way of making money?
Very funny. But don’t you get irritated when people PRETEND to be interested in you? Well, if you’re going to pretend, maybe it’s better if you don’t try? As you could end up losing those prospects for ever?
Many people may not feel at ease with your reply, me included with my first impression.
But …
You may not really be into creating rapport with people and your passions and interests may lie somewhere else. And that isn’t a bad thing.
One suggestion may be to find someone, who can do that part for you, while you focus on the product or service.
Rich told us what can bring greater profits, but he didn’t say we have to do *that* ourselves …
Rich Schefren is DA MAN! Mad props son!!!!
I like the blog post here. My BIGGEST AH HA was dat i can make money online now because i know how to tippity tap into my prospect’s brains and feelings.
Tomorrow I want you to show us how to write a sales letter that SELLS the heck out of deeze prospects!!!!!!
Hi Rich, I think you wrote about this before – the ability to “articulate your prospects problems better than they have ever done”. After reading this, I’m getting greater clarity now. Empathy is really lacking in my marketing…
My question is, what if I am in a market that I don’t really know in a deeper level?
I’m doing marketing for a partner (who is not really good at marketing). He is in the investment market, and I know about his products… but I don’t really know deeply what are some of the struggles that traders and investors face, simply because I have not experienced them.
Does that mean I have to doing a little trading and investing myself so that I can feel what they are feeling? I really don’t want to do that because I’m not earning much yet…
What can I do?
great question charles…. and i am glad the dots are connecting for you. i think you’ll most likely get your answer tomorrow, we’ll see where the rest of the comments take us.
My “aha” was about getting deep feelings out of people impersonally; so they are not hiding them.
Go to investment group meetings and get collective experiences. Listen, don’t lecture.
Great post, Rich! My two biggest take aways are the quote by Peter Drucker “The goal of marketing is to make selling superfluous” and the idea of explaining the customer’s problems better than they can. This seems to be the key to really having a customer feel that you understand them, and thereby initiate the first step of trust. (Stephen Covey covered this brilliantly in his ‘7 Habits’ book.)
So in terms of the next step, particularly for a sales letter (when there’s not necessarily a dialogue going on), once you’ve empathized with the customer and they feel truly understood, what’s your next step? And can you give any examples, be it sales letters that you’ve written or any other material that you’d recommend?
Again, the time and thoughtfulness that you’ve put into the posts is greatly appreciated!
Gerard
How can you POSSIBLY eat steak and have cake and eat it too? That is the MILLION DOLLAR QUESTION.
Can anyone answer this frightening question? How is it possible. I would like Rich Schefren to dive further into this agonizing topic.
For instance, when I create a marketing piece, I am always doomed to fail from the beginning because of my cat. She runs across the keyboard and screws up what I’m doing.
I will NEVER be a millionaire at this rate. Should I put the cat to sleep?
I have not slept in 3 days. And I cannot sleep until I get this answer. Thank you Rich!!
i think it’s time to get some sleep adam
HAHAH what an idiot.
THANK YOUU!
I have twitted this to my twitters.
1. I have recently been reading Claude Hopkins “My Life in Adv” per your suggestion fr. Marketing Lessons. your statement above about articulating prospects problems better than they have ever done…parallels what i was just read this morning…
“I came to know them, their wants and impulses, their struggles and economies, their simplicities….when i talk to them in print or in person, they recognize me as one of their kind”
i think that timeless wisdom of hitting a responsive chord you used in your internet manifesto proves it works even in today digital world.
2. u mentioned the top mistake people make. what are some other mistakes to watch out for?
yes it most certainly still works in the digital world… probably more so than ever before because we tend to be MORE isolated now, not less.
and to your question… we’ll certainly focus on other important mistakes entrepreneurs are making.
“When an expert describes your problem better than you can – you automatically assume they also have a way to solve it!”
There’s more to that sentence than meets the eye.
When someone who doesn’t either have a reputation as an expert or exude expertise describes your problem well, you may assume they see it so clearly because the problem is still staring them in the face.
When someone who exudes strength describes a problem, even if they admit they’re still searching for the solution, you’ll believe that they’re going to find it and it’s going to be a good one.
Would you rather learn from a wimp who got lucky and stumbled on a solution, or an expert who applied their strengths to create a solution? Who’s solution do you think would be more reliable, reproducible, ethical, enduring, etc.?
My question: how do you make people feel you’re “just like them” without stepping down from your position as the expert?
I have a sneaking suspicion the answer is to elevate the reader. The “it’s not your fault” section of many sales letters could help with this. “You’re not struggling because you’re beneath me, the expert. You just need the solution I found, and then your true greatness will be unleashed.”
great point antone – and while your sneaking suspicion is on target, the right remedy is a lot more powerful (and a lot less cheesy) than “it’s not your fault.”
I’ll definitely explain this in much greater detail in an upcoming post.
I love that…
That does click for me.
Looking very much forward to the cont’d :)
Hugs from Portugal :)
Hi Rich,
If you build the trust and rapport first, then the money will keep on coming for a very long time as the relationship grows and develops.
If you go for the money first, you will burn the bridge, losing any possibility of getting them over to your side.
Not only do you lose their money and relationship. You also lose the people that they would have told about you and how you contributed to their success.
Also, if I structure all my content around providing solutions rather than just information, it should resonate with the market better.
Now that we have identified the problems, and articulated them better than the prospects, what is the best way to get the message out?
How did you do get the message out for the internet business manifesto and how does that compare to how you would get the message out today?
Kind Regards,
Graeme.
yes graeme… you’re getting it.
great question… i need to ponder that one… but i’m thinking it would be an excellent topic to write about.
I now better understand why I instinctively never liked the hard sell approach that tries to bully the prospect into buying. I always want to see that the seller understands my problem and at least shows me that he has a solution that I can buy into.
Taking the time to articulate the prospect’s concerns in a believable way that shows that I personally really understand opens the door. Now take the next step and show part of the solution without trying to close the sale at this time. Continue the dialog and the prospect will raise his hand without high pressure tactics. You have now established rapport that can translate into increased sales downstream as more solutions become available. This all ties in well to what Clayton Makepeace also practices.
Sometimes, depending upon the problem and the solution, you might even find that you can lay out the description of the problem and solution over multiple communications with the prospect without ever asking for a sale. Then repackage into a step-by-step action plan and the prospect will gladly purchase.
Rich,
I really had 2 aha moments with today’s post. The first concerned your statement that the problem you have experienced (and more importantly that your prospects have) are the seeds to your next marketing breakthrough. Again you certainly have demonstrated that with the Internet Business Manifesto.
The second aha was your statement that when an expert describes your problem better than you can, you automatically assume they also have a way to solve it. After reading the Internet Business Manifesto, which described my problem with online marketing so well, I certainly made that assumption. I am very close to a solution to my IM problem, and GPS has played a big role in that solution.
Based on the post today, what I need help with is how to identify and articulate my prospects’ problem(s) if I am not in the Internet Marketing niche. If my business problems primarily are IM problems, am I limited to marketing to the IM niche? That’s the key issue for me.
Thanks for doing this, Rich.
Curt Siemers
Rich, you made a number of good points, but the two that stand out is, “people don’t want more information, they want advice.” and “be able to articulate the prospect’s problems better than they can.”
In order to develop rapport with the prospect or customer you really need to understand them, and not from a clinical perspective.
Most people can sense if your interest in genuine or if there is an ulterior motive involved. To develop relationship and trust, there must be a genuine meeting of the minds; even if it is from your sales copy.
Rich,
The ‘Aha’ moments come from realizing my best potential business ideas, will come from the biggest challenges I have in my life, because many others have the exact same problems. So as I solve these for myself, being able to articulate that to the prospect in a way they have never before heard before, but connects completely to how they feel emotionally, will result in extraordinary sales(profit) and most importantly, self satisfaction.
The satisfaction in 1. Having helped myself, 2. Having helped others and 3. Having made a significant amount of money.
I think my biggest aha is that my BIGGEST mistake thus far, has been that my major reason for wanting to be successful was greed. Wanting to choose a niche or product for one reason- most potential profit.
I now understand, that is FAR down the list…and will make me more successful than ever before.
Thanks beyond measure.
Teddy
so true teddy. my biggest successes have come from solving my own problem and then going to the marketplace and selling the same solution. obviously there’s a lot more nuances involved but that is certainly the starting point.
i also want to point out that what i wrote about applies just as much to those who sell things other than information. we still want someone to tell us the best tv for our living room, or the best cell-phone for our lifestyle, or the best laptop for our business goals, etc….
HEY EVERYONE
DON’T FORGET TO END YOUR COMMENT WITH A QUESTION (IF YOU HAVE ONE) – CAUSE IT’LL MAKE WHAT I WRITE TOMORROW EASIER FOR ME AND MORE RELEVANT FOR YOU!
rich
WOW…I got a comment and a scolding from Rich Schefren all within a minute of each other :)
Sorry I didn’t include a question as the instruction was really clear.
My absolute burning question is “Cracking” the barrier to get into their life and they listen to me. I think it is a LOT more than just a good, crafty headline. So how do I get someone who needs what I have, to be aware that I have the solution?
Thank you Rich for everything. Still want to know, and plans for another “Live Marathon” anytime soon?
Teddy
My biggest AHA moment was when you explained the power of being able to articulate someone’s pain more clearly than they are able to do.
It’s definitely my experience that when someone sees more than I do about something that I care deeply about, I’M ALL EARS! I’ll follow that person to the ends of the Earth if they keep delivering the goods and taking me further in the direction I want to go.
So focusing on that as the prime objective for effective marketing copy is a powerful lesson.
Thanks for the great post, Rich.
Steve
And here’s my question: How do you find time to focus on the stuff that matters most, and still take care of the “little things” that also have to get done? Thanks!
My biggest ah-ha is found in this statement:
“Your prospects are NOT currently craving more information (we’re already overloaded) . What they crave more than anything else is ADVICE. And before anyone considers paying for advice (or buying the physical product you advise) they have to feel that you understand them.”
It’s not that what you’ve said is new to me, more than anything it’s helped solidify what I’ve already believed.
In fact, as I’ve come to realize that my problems aren’t as unique to me as I would like to think, I’ve actually found myself analyzing the various solutions in front of me based on how well the author understands the issue. I’ve really paid attention to the conversation taking place in my own head and so I want a solution from someone that already understands that conversation.
My question however, is how can I make sure I’m being genuine in my marketing? How can I effectively convey that I truly do feel my prospects pain, especially if it’s in a market where I don’t have a lot of experience?
Hi Rich
It’s so to difficult to pick out my biggest AHA from today, there were so many.
Ok here’s one – Your prospects are NOT currently craving more information (we’re already overloaded) . What they crave more than anything else is ADVICE.
This made me realize that all my sales letters are really just offering information. They certainly don’t have enough of my own personality in there. I read a lot of sales letters on line that I often find over-hyped, and although they are clearly successful, I find it hard to understand why. I guess that although they don’t resonate with me, they do make a connection with other people. You can’t please all of the people all of the time!
What I’d love to learn from you tomorrow is how to structure a sales letter to create that empathy with your prospects.
Fabulous stuff Rich, keep it going.
Thanks
Phil
I’d like to echo Phil’s comment and request. Given that a common error is to offer information instead of advice, how do we structure the sales letter to follow through on that? What in the sales letter/message tilts it towards empathy and offering advice as opposed to just delivering information?
Thanks.
Chuck
Hi Rich,
The biggest nugget I got today is truly we all have challenges and truly do feel like it’s unique to us.
Again, I noticed some errors in the post (Not intended to offend). The same thing that happens to me when I have written a lot of words and I get kind of lazy to read it to correct errors (e.g. using ‘their’ for ‘they are’ because it’s sound similar; or writing ‘you’ in place of ‘your’).
It’s like we have some things in common.
Well, I can’t think immediately of what I want you to help me with right now (a JV deal is always good though)
LOL fisayo….
i’m certainly not a great speller – never have been, never cared enough to make the effort to improve… my bad :-(
but the mistakes didn’t come from being lazy at all. it’s not easy to write a blog post like this in the morning and hit my 10am deadline.
I wake up early, workout, have breakfast with my family, then drive to work, then read all of yesterday’s comments and then proceed to write today’s post. It’s a challenge to get it all done by 10- and that’s why i committed to doing it for this week (only) – next week I might push back the time, cut down the frequency, or press on for another week. i guess i’ll decide on friday.
a jv, huh? what’s your product?
Hi Rich
Great post, I love what you are saying. My biggest aha was that one well written piece of marketing material can go viral and produce that kind of extraordinary results.
My question is this: Once we understand (or think we understand) our prospect problems and concerns, how do we convert that into a sale for a seemingly unrelated product.
For example, we sell jewelry. Saying to a client, “I know money is so tight for you now and its hard to make it these days, buy some jewelry and you’ll feel much better” seems almost laughable…actually I did chuckle a little…maybe they will too.
Cheers!
Roman
i chuckled too roman. but you have to isolate the problems your product CAN solve. a few come to mind that might be appropriate for you – what do you think they might be.
also, the more generic the problem, the less power it has – so when you take something like “money being tight” it’s not going to create the powerful marketing message i wrote about here.
all of this is very true. the other half to excellent communication is listening….so interact with your customers, try to understand their experience and really listen. when you can mirror back a receptivity to their world, they will allow you (and your sales pitch) in.
question: what is the most effective way to give advice without
seeming to give it?
One way you can do it, is to let the customer know that they may actually know more than you do. I have a friend that used to sell hand made jewelry at SF conventions. Sometimes I would help her, but I am not a jewelry person, myself. :-) So, I would start by admitting that fact. Then, ask what they liked for themselves. I could offer the opinion of a male, with the typical male’s lack of specialized knowledge.
That made me non threatening, and giving an opinion that might match the people in their life. You have to remember that women wear jewelry primarily for two reasons. 1) It makes them feel good to look good. 2) To look nice for the men they want to impress. Obviously, I’m not one of those men, but I can give a man’s opinion, for whatever it’s worth.
The result was that my opinion as a non expert was often asked. They didn’t feel threatened by an “expert,” and could let their own desires show. They could select two necklaces and get an “objective” (of sorts) opinion on which looked best on them. The point is that sometimes not being an expert is better. :-)
Rich,
You rock, once again! This article pinpointed a way I can translate my strong natural sense of empathy with people into a clearer message for my prospects and clients.
Can’t really empathize with the sales pitch guy thing though. Couldn’t we have a better story that might appeal more to business women too?
The male sexual prowess likened to marketing? Hmmmm….then what does that make of the feminine mystique?
Curious to see how creative you can be,
Joy
believe it or not Joy i had another example in the post, but i took it out cause it was too lengthy already.
next, i put parenthesis after every masculine reference and put a female reference inside, but it read awkwardly.
so finally i just stuck with the male reference – but i promise to come up with a better example next time.
I have read many books and articles on sales and marketing so a lot of what you said I already apply to my business practices and personal life. One piece of advise to anyone who might need it; If you wanna sell junk to make money open a dollar store, if you want to make long term profit sell yourself.
It was a real eye opener to know about the “expert” describing your problem and the customers reaction to it. I always tended to be more analytical about problems. Since I am not a writer, by any stretch of the imagination, how do I get my thoughts into words to motive my marketing?
ok james – you’re not alone on this challenge.
read my reply to oliver (towards the end of the comments so far) on the best way to get going.
Today’s Ah huh moment: continue on a journey of your own (life learner here) and you will be able to articulate your prospects problems better than they can.
How would you teach the difference between information and advice?
Thank you for prompting us to share.
My greatest AHHA…
Exact topic I have been concerning these days – how to be “on my clients’ side” but feel a trustworthy expert. So, there are many points of view, which add some hint to this concern.
Thank you, Rich, Thank you, everyone!
My question is, probably, from a little bit different are, bu anyway… How to keep right proportion between personal coaching, big training programs and “packed” products and leave some time for the personal life :-)?
regarding your question liubov… i’m thinking i might take a stab at those sore of issues next week – this week marketing, next week maybe an exploration into some personal success issues.
thanks for the question
Fine series of posts. I’ll be sure to follow and share . . .
AHA: I’m also a Drucker fan. I like the effective marketing makes selling superfluous quote.
Q1: How do you make it safe for your customer to share their problem?
The safety issue: one of the last times I disclosed my pain to someone, I got pummeled for it. And while I have many other positive experiences being open, that one painful experience still echoes around in my head. And weighs heavier than the positive experiences.
I’m quite certain that the business owners who make up my market are in a similar place. In fact, my last few conversations were with business owners who were completely vested in their frustration, but just couldn’t be open enough to hear an empathic reflection of their situation.
And . . .
Q2: I’m told I’m pretty good at articulating other’s problems in a way that helps them make sense of it. However, I’m drawing a blank with this in my business. How do I translate the success I’ve had out of my work life into my business?
Many thanks,
Clarification: How do I translate my skill at articulating somebody’s problem better than they could into my business relationships?
ok jeff…
1 – you don’t have to reveal that you have had or have the problem – that’s your choice…
2 – you don’t necessarily want your customer’s to share their problems – instead you want to already know their problems and share it with them.
does that help?
Okay the FIRST “aha” moment was the comparison to a seduction … so THAT’S the rational behind all those interminably long sales letters. One of the sales formulae that is popular (possibly from Mark Joyner) goes roughly like this: Life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Find thirsty buyers. Sell lemonade. Repeat.
My reaction, in real life, to those long, long, long sales letters is … Tell me “How much?” and then I’ll decide. So in most cases I skip to the end anyway. Then I classify the price as a) pocket change, b) something I’ll have to have an excuse to tell my wife about, or a c) “mortgage the farm, and build a gangplank, my ship has come in” kind of issue, or sadly a d) “my name isn’t Rockafeller” out of my league thing.
One of the smartest things Ebay ever did was to implement the “buy it now” buttons. Online sales copy should always have one of those shortcuts near the top for folks like me. A few of the people who have learned to apply this technique to women are making a fortune teaching it to others. (BTW it is almost heartbreaking to know that being a faithful, happily married man seems to be the one shortcut to attracting women.) Going back to the lemonade analogy, remember the “trick” was to find “thirsty” customers.
My SECOND “aha” was in recognizing that although you made a lot of money from the Internet Business Manifesto because it “went viral” it was certainly to a large extent the fact that your jv partners had collected a “critical mass” of buzz around the release that in all probability 3 MM prospects had at least “heard” of it before sales slowed to a trickle, so your 30k sales transactions was about 1% conversions, which is about what one might expect for a very well handled Direct Marketing campaign. You may be giving those jv partners less than they are due in that initial success. I say that especially since I don’t remember being at all impressed with it (sorry, but true). (Okay, the net income remains impressive regardless of what I thought of the product.)
Though I am not a fan of the long, long sales letter I am a believer that repeated contacts build relationship, but even when I have put together a list of autoresponder messages that are all “give aways” of “fre.ebies” my conversion rates tend to remain in the 0.0001 (which is to say 0.01%) range (or lower) (Yipes.)
I’m a sparkling conversationalist, but one exceptionally poor “sales” person for some reason. If it’s not a voodoo curse, is there something you can suggest?
Thanks. I hope this ramble is of some help to someone else as well. (All that “my problems aren’t at all unique” stuff is true, I know.)
Sincerely,
Stafford “Doc” Williamson
no doubt doc…. the original jv partners (a fraction of what we have now) certainly did get the ball rolling – i can’t deny that.
and thanks for being honest about the manifesto… kind of surprised… but appreciate the feedback nonetheless.
i do have some suggestions on how you can remedy your situation – and no they don’t require you to buy some voodoo course… but they do require you to keep reading what i’m posting and occasionally reminding me of the question until i answer it.
FIRST QUESTION:
My AHA was the part about people NOT looking for information, they are looking for ADVICE.
I look back at what I have been going through trying to start an online marketing business. I can tell you there is more information then one can handle! I have gigabytes of it stored on my computer!
Yet, what I really wanted was “ADVICE”. What I wanted (and still want) is someone to tell me what I should do (and I mean that with a very big capital “I”). That is the question I ask every chance I get. And over time, I have been getting the answer, just not from one person.
SECOND QUESTION:
I think you left out a WHOLE BOOK at the point you wrote “Pay close attention here, this is real important…”
When you can state a person’s problem better then they can, it only says that you may have had the same problem, but at least you understand and can articulate it better.
But “getting it” DOESN’T make you an expert. That’s the “missing book”. How does one move from “same problem” status to being an “expert” with ADVICE on it?
Looking forward to tomorrow!
noel – there’s no rule that when you articulate the problem you have to confess you either suffered from it or suffer from it. and by leaving that piece of information out – the conclusion most people will come to is that you are indeed an expert. especially if you then lay out an approach on how to fix it.
now, there’s something else you can do – which is show them that their problem is really a symptom of a much deeper problem (most problems we experience are really symptoms of something deeper) and if you do that you’ll immediately vault to expert-status. but the particulars of that i’ll need to address in an entire post dedicated to that itself.
I am not sure I agree that JUST articulating the problem better then the other person can leads that person to conclude you are an “expert”.
The FIRST response will be as you state in your article “Finally! Someone who understands what it’s like to be me!”. Then I think the person will think something like “If they can state it so clearly, maybe they know something I don’t know, or maybe even have an answer how to fix it”.
Now they will either wait for you to give them “more information” or they will ask you a question, or a series of questions that will lead to the big one; “so, how do I fix it?”. This is the “test” to see if you are an expert or not.
At this point what you say will either tell them you are or or not an expert, as you suggest in your statement “especially if you then lay out an approach on how to fix it.”
So the understanding is one thing, and having the answer is another. But anytime one “has the answer” they ARE the expert.
I do agree that most problems one perceives one has is not the “real” problem at all. Having been a counselor, I also know that one can see much better from the outside. The reason I am sure you know is because the person with the problem lets emotions get too involved in their thought process, while the person on the outside usually thinks more with logic.
And that very fact means that often the start of “the fix” is to help the person try to put some of the emotion “on the shelf” and start thinking more with logic.
well said noel
i especially like what you said that if you know how to fix it you ARE an expert…
i just would like to add that if you don’t know how to fix your prospect’s problems… you shouldn’t be selling anything in that market (i know that was implied, but i want to make sure no one misses that crucial point).
1. Tell me your biggest AHA from today. What was the most valuable nugget you from today’s post?
Rich: it’s sad but true: I am almost a “religious” features-and-benefits writer. It’s hard to make myself write emotional copy.
Nonetheless, if you say that’s what I need to do,
then I’ll find a way to practice it and improve.
2. Based on what I laid out for you today – what would you like me to help you with tomorrow?
Please dig into more details and examples on this empathetic copy writing style. Any principles you can provide are greatly appreciated.
The aha moment that I took away from this is that my prospects are not currently craving more information, and what they crave is advice.
My question is that I have a product and service that solves one of the problems that many (all) of our local businesses have. We are very successful on a local level, and would love to branch out. How do we bring this message and successful business to the world stage and solve this problem everywhere??
Regards,
Darryl
Thanks, Rich for a GREAT post. I appreciate it!!!
First, my “AHA” moment occurred when you related marketing to dating.
You don’t ask for the “sale” at the first encounter. Instead, you work on developing the relationship, and then, at the appropriate time, the “sale” is easy. In fact, it will be more like “sharing” than selling. (Also, sticking with the dating analogy, any woman who would sleep with you upon first introduction will probably not be interested in a solid, healthy, long-term relationship. Same with impulse buyers.)
Second, I’d like to hear your suggestions for “developing the relationship” – leading to the point of sale.
Thanks again, Dr. George
First, thank you for starting a conversation of real substance.
Often forum conversations are a bit painful when you have read, read, read, and then decide it really wasn’t worth the time you just spent.
thankfully, not the case here.
I agree with many of the previous posts that a big “AHA” is “what we really want is not more information but we really crave is ADVICE.”
Could we take it a step further?
Wouldn’t it also be true that we really crave not only the ADVICE but also evidence for why ADVICE is good (so we can justify it in our own minds), and MOST of all, step-by-step instruction on how we should apply the ADVICE to achieve the desired benefit?
So many times we already possess the answers to our problems within us (not unlike the mountain Internet Marketing information on my hard drive that I have not yet applied effectively) – often a skilled coach, counselor, or even salesperson simply needs to ask the right question(s) and then shut up and listen – when prompted properly we will often solve our own problems given the chance AND amazingly the “listener” is often regarded as brilliant.
I hope to learn how to apply this skill effectively online to help people solve their problems.
It is a lot more than selling an ebook, an upsell, a back-end, etc.
To harken back to your original statement yesterday –
“That which is most personal, is most general” – (unique but common struggles)
With full utilization of modern technology would it be possible for us to dispense the desired and needed ADVICE in such an effective way that the receiver gets the same benefit as they would in a one-on-one coaching session?
Often a person doesn’t have the money to invest in the one-on-one coaching – the burden is on the customer to come up with the money. Perhaps the burden could be on the expert to become more creative and efficient in delivering the needed solution.
Do you think about this side of the equation very often?
It might not always lead to maximized profit but could very well lead to maximized good being done to benefit to others. What do you think?
so true kerry – we only want advice from those we feel understand our challenges, problems, and opportunities completely
Maybe I can take another stab at better articulating my question:
As a member of the Founders Club, I find the amount of information to be overwhelming along with the feeling that I need to learn it all ASAP. It is quality material but very modular in nature.
Question: Is there something available that gives an overview of a step by step approach to learning and applying the material?
Maybe there is something obvious that I am overlooking.
I would imagine the $397 per month Business Growth System would include it, but I am just not able to invest at that level right now. I have no doubt it is worth even more than you are charging.
thank you
That is awesome! How you said… “All you have to do is articulate your prospects problems better than they have ever done.” Puts it is such a way that compels me to want to spend the rest of the week going deeper in understanding my customers and clients.
I’m guessing when it comes to this part Rich, besides the different research tools on the net, it’s just you and your note book? Really taking the time to get into your customer’s head just might be one of the most important, yet skipped over steps in building your business..
Thanks Rich!
yep, paul – that’s the way to start
further down the comments i address how to get started with this in my answer to oliver – check it out… i think it’ll give you a good direction to run with.
Aaaa…Woooo….ha,
So were all NOT in for a big ride today?
Okay … Relax alex,
Take a Deep breath
and go ..
I know for a fact this thread is gonna change lives, no question and I have a hunch my life is gonna be one of them?
How I see this right now rich …
What you are getting at in this post is really on the tip of my tounge but for the life of me i could never express it in words like the way you are about to…
Infact it’s about to become new learning for me I know, so …
I’ve just caught up with these last couple of posts and
I’m loving what you’re doing here,
I’ll sure be asking my questions all week …
So Like you said …
All you have to do is articulate your prospects problems better than they have ever done,
Perfect example
when I joined your GPS coaching program you told us students
this very quote from Peter Drucker
“The goal of marketing is to make selling superfluous”
you then went into some detail which painted the picture for us students what that quote ment
and how you apply it over at your SP headquaters, to dominate the IM niche
Well that days lesson for me changed everything in my business.
… You see,
that day I had Instant Clarity on Internet marketing
It let me understand:
we are Internet marketers not Internet sellers
That was a Big lesson when it comes to our online profits
maybe rich you should go deeper into how marketing makes selling superfluous for your readers here,
From that day,
I think life will never be the same mainly because we now understand why people spend there hard earns cash online
and how to get them to WANT to pay it to YOU/US before you even ask for money its genius,
(like we joke about when ever I read a free report of yours I know I’m gonna wanna pay you $5,000 by the end of the free report) – happy too :-)
And I learned how to apply that online myself from that one session with you,
It’s yet to fail me …
And
From that day i lesrned ir to this date i run my business by this quote:
“Don’t chase money let money chase me”
As you know the results have been outstanding – almost unreal and down right scary,
Infact i become scared of my new found success … But any how I digress…
Now what im getting at here is I know there is still alot more I have going on around me
that I don’t quite yet understand or i cant put my finger on it
Or it’s one the tip of my tounge but I some what feel tounge tied
What ever it is – I know it’s gonna shine through in this thread this week
And I believe I’m personally
Will soon see another moment of clarity that will take our usiness to new hights as the week progresses
As of now I don’t really have a question but I wanna tell you I’m onboard and I’m excited to see what unravels over this next week or so :-)
One last thing …
You stated - Marketing is like seduction right
I know it’ll go down well with all the male & female readers I’m sure right?
Paint the picture with it using the SPdotcom way of online marketing
Using empathy,
and ofcourse you can cover leverage perfect with this senario,
And it doesn’t have to become a novel but paint us the picture
And Also point out the wrong way of doing it
Its a great time to expose how bad it really looks when people use your advise wrongly it becomes down right #sleesy right?
Now that would be some outta the box shit right there!
But be careful in your writing if you do go this route
(which i hope you can)
as online marketing is ofcourse marketing “one to many ” as you taught us,
& it becomes more of a process of numbers using this marketing aka seduction that can loose alot of empathy along the way when the focus is on numbers
So i do have a question
How instead can we build on empathy instead of loose it in the numbers and metrics game?
My back lash is look at neil strauss book “the game” when they had the system down pat there was no empathy to picking up the ladies & it became sleezy, even to themselfs!
Do you know what I’m trying to get at or am I just off on the wrong path?
I hope you and some readers get what Im on about
What ever way my finger is killing and i’m on my iPhone so i’m picking back up with you tomorrow on PC
thanks for doing this rich,
Even though I feel tounge tied – I know what you are pointing at …
.., And i know its huge
again I’m excited of the way you have introduced it to us
and now on the way you deliver the story
You tell it your way … I trust well see your vision (thanks again for everything man)
It’s been a blessing to work with you,
A real tipping point about to take place for many readers I believe,
Some super creative stuff being covered and if you vision it -like I hope too will change the Internet as we know it
It’s a pleasure to join this venture with you all
Alex jeffreys
wow alex! what can i say… it’s fun having a fan of someone you’re a fan of (smile).
for those of you who don’t know… alex was in my gps coaching program, and within the first month or so… went from $15,000 a month to taking in over $300,000 in a few short weeks.
marketing is incredibly profitable when it’s leveraged correctly!
Wow rich … That means alot to me man … Thank you so much for the kind words & support man,
It is a real eye opener for me. I am already connected with 1000’s of people across the globe on internet, however the only thing I missed was to build a rapport ( I was so dumb).
Thank you once again.
Hi Rich,
Things are heating up…the excitement is flowing…as are the ahha’s.
My biggest is that even if we are not internet marketers we can submit the word “marketing” with the word “customer”.
I would like to see specific examples of just how you implement this strategy daily. Now I appreciate that is what is happening right here and now…I am glued to the screen. As well as taking notes and sharing with others your link.
I also am appreciating the timing of this dialogue as I am starting posting to my new blog. Which means I get to test live what I am learning…let my readers be the judge I say!
Cheers
John C Spark
Thanks for this blog. What I got from this, is that I will ask a couple of questions on my website to peek some interest and change my copy up a little, so I create more of a relationship with my customers. I will communicate better about why they need my product. Thanks! I’ll see you tomorrow.
Sheri Watson
Rich,
1. The analogy to seducing a woman, of course!
2. I don’t really have any questions based on this post, my biggest concern is on another level, staying focused and not procrastinating. I KNOW everything I need to know to be successful(member of the original GPS) but i just cant get myself to actually take action. I think because I’m uncertain on what I should focus. (Again, with gps I have all the tools I need to figure this out, but I still struggle…) I need a simple process or system to figure out what’s most important, and a method to stay focused on that.
Thanks,
Chris
Biggest take away… marketing comes before selling yet so few do it that way if at all.
What I would like to see more discussion on…
I’m seeing a lot of build up to launches that are giving a lot of stuff away up front to create value. They’re separating themselves from other launches that just build the hype and are raising the bar in a way.
If most people are “misunderstood” how does giving stuff away help them to feel understood assuming it’s something that we think they need or want because we understand them. When do we miss the mark by giving something away that isn’t what they want or need? I have a few launches in mind “Hershey”.
If we want to attract more people but “our” current struggle limits our audience by definition of the problem would we place a premium on the product or service by the shear “nichiness” of it. Would that backfire and have others feel that we’re taking advantage of their problem?
Hi Rich,
I have been your follower in the last few days and today’s post is an eye opener for me.
The issue of seduction doesn’t exist in many marketers diary. It is very interesting to know that irrespective of a woman’s feeling towards a man on the first meet the chance of accepting the bed of roses is 99.9%. We have failed here why lie, a marketer wants his product purchased by a prospect from Jupiter who doesn’t know about your Earth. Developing relationship is what i feel today dialogue is all about.
How can i do this when I don’t have blah blah traffic? Rich you can answer this in the next post.
great question peter – and it’s defanitely one that needs to be answered – please remind me until i answer this question because i know how important it is to you and others…
Rich… If you can simply show us step by step, the practical and easiest -HOW to- of extracting a target audience’s deepest problems/struggles AND emotions… you’ll be a champion all over again. lol
no problem jim… it’s easy, but it can take some time…
start out by reading my comments to oliver a couple comments down
Very Interesting & Progressive too.
@Jim Tour: Try talking to your customers and stop thinking about them as “it”s. :-)
My biggest AHA was a memory the blog post triggered. At my day job we had a meeting with the head of sales of a new JV partner. He taught us about the product (a complex software solution for reducing printing costs, ensure document delivery and increase revenues).
I started off by saying that I am kinda overwhelmed by the complexity of the product and I don’t know where to start. Then he restated that the product is indeed complex and that I probably have problems on how to present the solution. He went into great detail and he sketched some simple pictures as he explained. I instantly got pumped and said “Exactly!” – and the whole workshop just took off from there.
About the next post, how do you practice this the best way possible? I understand that it’s a skill and that you need to master it and in order to do so you probably have to leave your Comfort Zone, like spending a bunch on AdWords just for sake of practice. Would you recommend just doing that for a few months?
you practice this oliver by first being able to articulate your own problems really well. i do this through journaling, and obviously i get a lot more benefit than simply being able to write about problems… in fact, i find the best way to solve my own problems is by getting really clear about what they are and the impact their having on my life.
next, you read how others have articulated problems in general. if you haven’t read my report “the uncertainty syndrome” I’d strongly recommend it. also, reading books like “passages” which documents the common themes that most people experience throughout their life.
and lastly, you read lots of blog comments and forum threads in the niche you currently operate. and once you get a handle on what those problems are you begin writing about those – and often times you can practice right there where you find them (on the blog and the forum) and judging by the response you’ll know when you are on the right track.
hope that helps!
rich
Rich, thank you so much for your time and advice. I made a new commitment to make this a daily habit and got right to it. :-)
For everyone else who wants to practice this: Give Yahoo Answers a try.. Getting a bunch of points for “Best Answer” is rewarding and motivating and you have a metric to go by and set goals by – I guess I’m a geek.
My biggesst ‘AHA!’ moment was when I read that “All you have to do is articulate your prospects problems better than they have ever done.” What a simple yet effective way to connect with people. I see it in sales copy all the time, but now I see it in a different light. From reading your excellent post, my question would be ‘what’s the best way to learn how to get money to chase me?’ It seems like it’s a fantasy or illusion to me. There must be something simple that I’m not understanding in order for that to happen?
great question dave…
and it’s one i plan on answering in upcoming posts – but as a favor – can you remind me again of this question in tomorrow’s post, this way i can make sure not to forget it (because it’s a great question!)
AHAA! “People don’t want information, they want advice.”
It actually goes against most training about educating your prospect/customer or at least changes the way you go about educating them. You don’t become “their” expert by showing them how much you know about your product, you become their expert by showing how much you know about them and their problems. From there they would naturally assume your product helps solve their problem.
so true randy…
“You don’t become “their” expert by showing them how much you know about your product, you become their expert by showing how much you know about them and their problems. From there they would naturally assume your product helps solve their problem.”
I couldn’t of said it better myself.
Hey randy … Your Totally correct with what you say here mate,
quote: – people don’t want information they want advise,
but here’s something I learned from Todd brown who works with rich
you want to supply a “conversation rarther than information”
– it’s so much more powerful
from my own testing with my latest reports – blog posts – and products :)
to success
alex
I’ve understood this theory all this while, but I just never know HOW to articulate the problems even if I have personally experienced them. This is my biggest problem – HOW. I’m just not very good in expressing my thoughts in words.
Cheers~
Mark
mark – just read my reports and you’ll see how it’s done
Hi Rich,
I absolutely agree with everything here.
I learnt about these concepts before but common knowledge is not always common practice so a little reminder is always good.
I currently have a blog designed to inspire aspiring young entrepreneurs – especially those who have doubts over their ideas.
The reminding of these great marketing concepts will aid me in providing more value for my readers.
Thank you for providing so much value, I really look up to you and I know alot of others do too! I’m 20 years old and resonate with everything here, this excites me! I love business and the pyschology behind marketing.
Rich, what is your biggest AHA moment you’ve ever had in this business?
Hate to break it on you, Rich, but if you are a heterosexual man who buys up a woman attention by paying for expensive dinners and so on to a woman you have just met, she is likely to consider you a “nice” friend and tell you she doesn’t want to loose you as a friend.
You see, women don’t like wussies.
Google up David Deangelo for more info.
well, since i am VERY happily married… and never needed a course to what came naturally to me… i think i’ll pass. but thanks for the recommendation.
tell me what you are trying to accomplish and where you are currently at… and i’ll either try and send you in the right direction or tell you what the next steps are.
great question aaron – now that sounds like a great blog post… i’ll have to let that mentally marinate for a while so i can make it a juicy post.
and thanks for the kind words.
also, good luck with your market – keying in young entrepreneurs can make a world of difference in their lives and really help put them on the right path… so kudos to you and what you do!
Thank you Rich.
I hope to meet you soon.
And I look forward to that blog post!
1. Tell me your biggest AHA from today. What was the most valuable nugget you from today’s post?
Keep delivering value now to who and what you have when you are concerned about your long term future
2. Based on what I laid out for you today – what would you like me to help you with tomorrow?
Competent people are not always authentic with their career paths due to role longevity as well as parental/society or partner feedback. For example: What do you? Im in sales. (rationale: Ive been selling things for 20 years) Reality: they dream and plan of many things more enjoyable to them than sales and feel entrapped by their own definition.
What do you recommend to people struggling with an inauthentic path?
you know what i recommend – but it’s not something most want to hear…. you’ve got to change paths and the sooner the better. i am reminded of the great commencement speech that steve jobs did 2 years back – if you haven’t seen it you need to go over to youtube and find it – he said (something like) if he wakes up too many days in a row not enjoying what he’s doing he knows it’s time to change.
i’ve completely changed the businesses i’ve had and the industries i’ve been in now four times. and my only regret has been not doing it faster.
1. My biggest AHA from this post was that I need to stop being a robot in my business. Sure I have skill and can do a lot of things from niche rsearch to a full product launch but I never get anywhere because I’m dry. My target market knows it and now I know it but..What am I going to do about it is the question and will I do it is another.
2. I wish you could help me find a personable partner to be my front man while I do the down and dirty technical stuff in the background.
As an aside, thanks for putting in the comments selections, I never read them but I should.
Rich, Not unlike the last project that I was sold on with you and Jay Abram, The League of Extraordinary Minds, you’re hitting the nail on the head again. I believe the # one AHA for me is something that happens in my best moments with lots of misunderstood folks that I talk to, like you said articulating their biggest problem better than they do. I believe the reason that this works so well is because when we are looking at these problems from an outside point of view instead of being personally engaged we bring this unique perception to the problem and allow some faith to build in the person that we are helping by letting them relax in the comfort that we truly do understand.
Let’s just go a little deeper with this thought before we move on so fast to a new thought?
i’d like to spend more time on each idea… but you know what? my fear is that i’d lose too many readers… because they want to discover something new each day… maybe i’m wrong…. it certainly would be nice if i was… maybe sometime in the coming weeks i’ll ask everyone and see what the consensus is.
Hi Rich,
I love that your questions and blog posts are really using the Socratic method. Making us think deeper than the surface is the key to real understanding, and once we really achieve the AHA level, we have the basis from which to solve our own problems. Very clever.
A few comments – for Victor – David D’Angelo is really Eben Pagan. He also teaches that your ability to state your prospect’s biggest frustrations, problems and fears better than they can is a real key to your own marketing.
A great book that I really love and share with friends is the Go-Giver by Bob Burg and John David Mann. It’s written as a modern-day parable and it relates to what you’re saying. It’s a quick read (probably 15 minutes for you, Rich :-)
Your original question reminded me of the book by Eckhart Tolle, Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose. Things that irritate you about others are in you. Things that you love about others are in you. It’s good to be aware of that when you are uncovering your prospect’s problems. It’s often the problems that we are seeking to solve for ourselves that we end up teaching.
I don’t know the origin of this quote and I am just paraphrasing – “if you have money problems, then it is rooted in the quality of your relationships.” For the person at the top of the thread, this might be worthy of some consideration. If you are only interested in the money, it will always elude you. If you aren’t earning what you want, then there is probably a problem with the way you are approaching your relationships with your prospects and clients. If your goal is to get a sale, it will only be one sale if you are only interested in the money and not the value you bring to your clients. The real money (and wealth of spirit) is in the relationship you build and the value you bring to others.
Also, as you’ve so aptly pointed out before, Rich, the wealth comes from the continued investments by your clients. It’s also the easiest sale because the trust is earned and the clients want everything you have to offer because they know you offer the solutions to their problems and the shortcuts. (The reason why most of my educational dollars are going to your products.)
(Another paraphrase) When you do the hard things, the big things are easy. When you take the easy way, the big things are hard. Digging deep to truly connect with your audience is hard, but when you do, the big things are easy. It’s worth the effort.
I have applied many of your lessons (some better than others) and have gotten amazing results. Just wanted to say thanks publicly. Your September Founders Newsletter was pure gold.
OK…had to say all of those things. I don’t have a particular question at the moment. I’ve been absorbing and re-reading many of your white papers and for those of you that are new to Rich’s work…it’s the best investment you can make in yourself. There are many other people selling information and “advice,” but Rich’s stuff really works. I’m enjoying watching this process unfold. Can’t wait to apply it to my market…doing that starting tomorrow.
Thanks, Rich!
gail… you’re making me blush!
i was really proud of that founder’s report… so thank you for mentioning that.
btw – i went to your website and i wondered if the questioning would be as effective the way you did it – without first setting them up on what they were about to read. not saying it won’t be effective, just a thought that popped into my head and figure it’s better sharing it than keeping it to myself.
Thanks for taking the time to check my site! I really appreciate the suggestion and was just sitting down to write another post. I’ll go back and add the set-up and see what happens.
Glad I could make you blush. I appreciate your advice and wisdom.
OK…I lied…just posted the first blog entry about the topic just now. Why wait?
I really didn’t have an aha discovery in this post, as I try to always offer suggestions on topics relevent to the problems and feelings of others. I learned this from you and Jay. but my question is ; what do you do after ten dates and you still don’t even get a kiss? I’m obviously missing something in the presentation that is not earning their trust.
Keep up the great work.
if you’re not even getting a kiss then i think you’re not doing as effective job in conveying what i am talking about here. can’t be any more specific without seeing a sample – but for sure somewhere you’re missing the mark
Hi Rich,
The most valuable nugget for me today is the ‘aha’ moments of remembering when I have applied this understanding – of where the client is at; and relating it back to them.
My clients have leaned forward in their chairs, their whole body anticipating my next words…saying ‘yes! that is it!’
These are the clients that keep coming back for more :-)
Yes, thank you for confirming I am on the right track.
There is no-thing more important to me than helping my clients move beyond their current state of pain.
Of course, having travelled that path myself, I can certainly feel empathy toward them…
Thanks so much,
Jacqui
nHarmony – Healing YOU Body, Mind & Soul
jacqui – it sounds like you are on exactly the right path! good job!
and thanks for commenting ;-)
You’re right as usual Rich!
One of the early contenders for my book title was “Business is a Seduction” but Men in Suits get squirmy hearing those words between 9-5.
Harvey Mackay said it well:
“Marketing is not the art of selling. It’s not the simple business of convincing someone to buy. It is the art of creating conditions by which the buyer convinces himself.”
Tsufit
Author, Step Into The Spotlight! : A Guide to Getting Noticed
http://www.spotlightbook.com
I see now how I was manipulated into so many different Business ventures by very talented recruiters. I will endeavor to offer more value in my attempts at prospecting having the empathy of the feeling of being taken for a ride and dropped on my head to figure out Marketing Models on my own. I think this is an area that gives us a bad name as I have felt it first hand as frustration and panicky loss a feeling of being left out to dry and struggle to learn this magnificent way to earn income.
I also see my own failings to properly educate my prospects to circumvent these propensities of failure to turn them into strengths.
Rich,
I agree whole heartedly here. Especially in todays climate where fear, uncertainty and broken trust is so pervasive.
I think there is a new democratization of Br4and movement ( not like Dems VS repubs).
It seems like such a cliche to US by now that people buy from who they know like and trust but so many businesses still think their BRAND is their logo, their tagline, some pantone color and they fail to see its all about connection.
face to face, eye to eye, man to man is where people EARN ( or lose) Trust.
The rest of the graphics, burocratic multileveled attorney approved ” positioning statements” are just window dressing that cant make up for the power of seeing and believing in a real person, faults, humanity and all.
Frank Lloyd Wright was an excellent example that despite some very public faults and frailties, having talent and relating to people on an emotionally impactful level can build an immortal personal brand.
thanks for your insight and forum for this kind of discussion.
bryan
Great post Rich, I think my aha moment is that you got to tap into your customers feelings sort of like put yourself in their shoes if you wanna sell to them easy. The process of marketting is the art of making selling easier, sort of the seduction process where you need to build trust and rapport with the customer.
Can you show us how we can go about building trust especially since we don’t see them and they don’t know us and how we can convert sales especially when we’re newbies
Hi Rich:
Thanks for a great post, and it came out at the perfect time. I am trying to figure out my “niche,” and what problems I solve for my clients (there are many).
However, your article made me see that if I can relate to my clientele and deftly articulate just ONE problem I solve for them, my (marketing) life would be so much easier!
As others have requested, it would be nice to see the exact elements to include in the sales letter, as well as the most effective ways to entice potential clientele to check one out (this was the first post I’ve read, so I’m sure I’ll be enlightened!).
I know it’s been a week since this post came out, but I wanted to thank you for the information and let you know how helpful it’s been for me :).
To your continued success,
Teri
P.S.
Can you please place the date of your posting at the top of the page? It would help me see your follow up posts much easier.
Very well said Rich,
Once we understand the fact the everybody, I mean everybody, is confused with so much information and what is worse, misinformation, empathy, rapport and profits come hand in hand.
The good thing is that I did not have to re invent the wheel, and this was my AHA moment.
Utilizing the principle of rapport equals profit has made a huge impact on my line of business.
Thank you guys,
A
Hey Rich, Just got exhausted reading the comments and made me feel that adding mine here is just academic. Anyway, articulation does help learning. I guess the aha for me was that everybody is experiencing the same problems but we all personalize it. That helps in writing copy, using emphathy andwriting from the prospects point of view. I can see how that increases credibility.
My question: you are just starting out and do not have all the credibility i.e. proof of making millions or super accomplishments how do you handle that challenge in your copy.
Good post, Rich!
My biggest ÀHA is the quote by Peter Drucker “The goal of marketing is to make selling superfluous” and the idea of explaining the customer’s problems better than they can.
The next step is to help us prepare an effective sales letter that shows us how you provide empathy and to market or pre-sell the product.