-
The conversation taking place on my previous post has been contagious.
So much so, it’s sparked a renewed enthusiasm on my part to tackle bigger challenges and issues currently taking place in our community, while also delivering profitable distinctions you can use to immediate grow your business.
Today, we’re going to roll-up our sleeves and begin a series that’ll solve the riddle of successful marketing. I said a series (as opposed to a single post) because we’re going to dive deep into what really makes insanely profitable marketing work – and that’s going to require some reflection on your part.
So, here’s the deal… I am going to post a new post (the next installment) each morning at exactly 10 A.M. on the dot everday this week.
Now, I want you to know I haven’t pre-written these posts. You see, I want this to be a dialogue – not a monologue. I’m going to use the comments you provide to guide me in sharing the next step.
That means you’ve got a responsibility too. Normally, only 1 out of every 350 readers takes the time to comment on an individual post. That means the views expressed in the comments section represent the vocal minority instead of the silent majority. We can do a lot better than that. Even if you agree with what’s been said, take a minute and comment so I can take your input into consideration in the next post. Agreed?
I promise you this: what you get from this series will be a reflection of what you put in. Stated more simply, if you play along… you’ll increase the profitable payoff you receive.
Alright, enough of that… let’s dive in…
In my last post I asked you if you’d like to know how I know my prospect’s problems better than they do – and the answer I received back was an astounding YES! So, that’s what we’re going to focus on this week.
And it all starts with a single sentence. In other words, I’m going to use this one sentence as the foundation for the entire series this week. Everything will build off this simple eight word sentence. Don’t be mistaken by it’s simplicity. Because buried deep inside these eight words is the key to massive success in business, politics, and every other area of life.
And here it is (in all it’s stunning simplicity):
“That which is most personal, is most general”
I realize right now you may neither see the power this sentence holds nor the answer it provides for growing your business. It’s my intention to show you both (the power and the answer) starting today and through the remainder of the series.
So, for today, let’s begin to break this sentence apart. To unwrap the words and begin to reveal the gift that is hidden below the surface.
It means that the deepest, most personal struggles you are currently facing do not, in fact, make you unique. Instead these deep issues are actually what you share in common with others.
And it’s exactly these shared deeper issues that’ll open the door to insanely profitable marketing.
Now, what makes this a huge opportunity, also makes it difficult to leverage. Because most of us have a hard time expressing (in words) the struggles we are currently facing. So today, I’d like you to reflect on one of the biggest struggles you are currently facing in your life. Spend 10-15 minutes writing about it, but not in an autobiographical sense. Instead, write about it as if it was a challenge that many of your closest friends were experiencing. Let it exude empathy…
Here’s an example from my report, “The Entrepreneurial Emergency: The Uncertainty Syndrome“
Now, before you run off and get greater clarity on your own (profitable) struggle – please tell me two things in the comments below (remember, this is a dialogue and I really need you to participate)
1-What does the sentence “That which is most personal, is most general.” mean to you?
2-What do you want me to focus on tomorrow? What if anything I’ve said today is unclear and you’d like greater clarity on?
Thanks in advance for your comments. And remember, check back tomorrow morning (10 AM) because we’ll take this concept much further and much closer to being profitable for you.
The Next Post In The Series Is Posted – Just Click The Link Below…
-
- Save / Promote This Post
- If you enjoyed this post, your vote is always highly appreciated!!
-
Link to this post: If you found this page useful, consider linking to Online Business Success In A Sentence ...
-
Just ONE Simple Shift...
ONE Obstacle Overcome...Can Bring You The BIG Results You Want From Your Online Business
Rich Schefren reveals the SIMPLE answer in his newest report...
The Uncertainty Syndrome: The Entrepreneurial Emergency
There Is No Reason Why You Can't Have The Success Gurus Have, By Dealing With The Same Simple Factor...Get it Now!
-
Internet Marketing Reports & Resources
-
Ask Rich
-
Bookmark Us
-
-
Internet Marketing Categories
- Internet Marketing Blog (127)
- Contests (1)
- Customer Value (2)
- Effectiveness (42)
- Online Entrepreneur (5)
- Internet Marketing (25)
- Make Money Online (3)
- Market Attention (9)
- Internet Marketing News (33)
- persuasion techniques (1)
- Quotes (2)
- Business Strategy (15)
- Taking action (8)
- Internet Marketing Tools (7)
-
Internet Marketing Archives
-
Popular Tags
marketing community jay abraham business owners business building marketers Tony Robbins john carlton strategic profits mike filsaime Gary Vaynerchuk marketing strategies momentum coaching program founders club business founder internet wealth Business guru online marketing founder internet business money manifesto entrepreneurs Blog business growth Rich Schefren overcoming constraints frank kern entrepreneur maven jeff walker home study business acceleration program business acceleration internet marketing marketing youtube profits email Brad Fallon internet marketers challenges constraints online business -
Contests
- 66 Seconds Video Contest (
enter)
- 66 Seconds Video Contest (
-
Community
-
Internet Marketing Products
-
Internet Marketing Tools
-
Internet Marketing Resources
-
Links
What we consider to be most personal are the things we believe and think we understand. In most cases people believe they know everything and wise tales and myths are born through generalizations.
Rich, this is a fantastic opportunity you are providing here, thank you.
Talk about your start in this business. I know you’ve done extensive work with Jay, but takes us back to the start. Was it the manifesto that put you on the map? Takes us through your journey and explain the major break throughs on the way and what you learnt. It would be like a time map of Rich with words of wisdom.
Regards Thomas
That which is the most Personal is the Most General is true because what we care most about is what with give most of Personal Energy to and people connect with other people’s energy.
Although every person is unique in the talents & beliefs they hold (as a result of the choices their made in response to social conditioning) they all need love,freedom, certainty, sense of belonging so look to grow the best way they know how given the distortions they have created in their own minds.
To discover more about the workings of the oneness (uni-verse = one voice) visit the a AbundantMystic.com
will do, thomas…
because how i started has everything to do with this powerful sentence. more than anyone right now could possibly imagine. so, i’ll definitely share that – thanks for the input!
and thanks for commenting – you were the very first visitor and you commented! we are already ahead of the game!!
rich
Hmm… to me it means that we all have our insecurities and problems and we tend to think that they are special. But when you talk to another person, someone you trust, they usually have a similar story that you can relate to.. Once you are over that, you can discuss and share more openly.
you’re on the right track oliver… good job.
1 You are unique, just like everybody else.
2 Commit me for God’s sake, commit me! AKA Focus me!
not exactly where i am going with this edward… sorry
I think many people consider their troubles, struggles and failings to be most personal, and that is very human, and common to all.
I would really like to know more about your struggles, and how you changed along the way to get where you are today.
Thanks.
yes – kel you are on the right track…
and regarding my struggles… definately going to spend some time there… God knows i’ve certainly have had my share.
I totally agree with Oliver’s statement. I have this to be so true in all areas of live. I first learned this in ministry talking to people. It’s crazy how we believe we are the only one with the deep dark struggle.
Another thing that statement brought to mind, even though it’s a little off the topic is…
How what we consider important may not be considered the same way by our customers. We must know what’s important to our cusomters and give them that.
So even if that has nothing to do with the statement, you helped me really understand that Rich, so thank you! :)
cool paul… so through the ministry you have first hand confirmation of what i am saying here – thanks for the confirmation.
glad i could assist – and yes it must be important to your prospects, customers, and clients.
Because most people are uncomfortable talking openly about their most deeply personal struggles, we rarely hear people talking about the things that are most personal to us. Knowing this gives us a powerful opportunity to connect with people, because by opening up and sharing our struggles, we can create a connection based on our similarities (which, according to Robert Cialdini, is a key to getting people to like you — one of his six keys to influence).
Genuine, honest openness like this is rare enough to remain effective even while other trendy marketing techniques get worn out by overuse.
Questions:
1) How do you convince people that you’re not just making up a sob story about your past as a sales technique — how do you get them to believe your story is real?
2) Is there a place for sharing your current struggles, or are you better off maintaining an image of strength by only talking about the one’s you’ve already conquered? If both, how do you decide when to share something you’re currently struggling with?
3) How to you walk the line between “too different from me, so their solution won’t work for me” and “too much like me — probably isn’t any more successful than me at solving this — I’ll be they’re lying about the level of their success”?
The questions are astute! But they are focused on the one doing the selling and not on the one doing the buying.
1) The trick is not to get stuck on the idea that sharing your story is required. That’s not necessarily the point. The idea is that they may share their story with you, and you are not judgmental or in a hurry. That is why Facebook is so popular. We can post a beef about our day, and a few responses let us know someone is listening. It is when you are caught deeply listening, even if it is only a tweet, you respond in kind. This response to conversation is where people can “vision” the kind of person you are and begin to trust you. You show up. You are kind. You post cool stuff. We like you.
2) The Image of Strength is sooooo old hat.
The fact is, we don’t need any images of any ideal. That’s all the stuff we can’t trust. The best way to get an idea of what kind of good will is “out there” for you is to post about a failure and every step that got you there. Ask for help! When your story is very real, and we can feel your actual anxiety, we jump up to help out! If you haven’t done the conversation thing very well, unqualified people show up. But if you are active in your circle, and people love what you bring to the table, they will rise up to help. When the website of a friend was down, I helped her with a page that said, “We need surgery and are in dire need of encouragement.” Her site is much-loved. She got over 500 testimonials and offers of money in less than three days. She had what Tara Hunt calls, “Whuffie.” It is a fund of good will that is more valuable than ideals of any kind. After we saw the response, we also posted a “Donate” button, and the gain was substantial when we let the entire list know that the situation was dire and would require funding. They jumped to the occasion!
3) When someone knows you have gone through the trouble of being a human and deeply listening–feelingly, empathetically–they are not thinking, “He is like me,” they are wondering, “What’s the next step? Where’s he going with this?” It’s like being a good dancer–we have to predict the next step together. There’s always a flow back and forth. Asking about their needs, and really listening by responding with your own reflection on the same issues, let’s them know they can talk to you. They feel you heard them.
Show up with goods, whether by tweeting links or sending out value to your list. Get the focus on them. (Hey! I found this cool thing you might like!!) Allow your faults to be perfectly ok. (My site is down and needs surgery.) Be kind. (“Love your pic!”)
Spread it around. Gain some friends in the process.
The response is bound to be, “So, I’ve seen you around here before. What do you do?”
cf
you are definitely on the right track antone – and you’re right this approach has a much longer lifespan than your traditional approaches.
love your questions – i hadn’t considered these issues, but i most certainly will as i write the follow-up posts this week.
thanks,
rich
“That which is most personal, is most general” That makes a lot of sense. If you think about personal feelings such as lack of confidence, body image or fear of financial debt. These are pain points that many people have at some point in their lives. I can see how marketing to these personal fears and insecurities would give you a leveraged advantage. Tomorrow or in future posts I’d like to hear how you capitalize your marketing. In an economic time where people are afraid to write cheques, I wonder what percentage of your revenue should be allocated to the hard costs of marketing.
Thanks Colin
you’re definitely on the right track colin – but i want to be clear, we’re going to meet our prospects, clients and customers where they are with what i am going to show you – however, it’s not a judo technique where we then use it against them.
and thanks for the question – i’ll definately answer it – if not this week then next.
Hat Rack is Full
After 12 years of 11 hour days, the profession of “juggler” fits the online entrepreneur better than “self employed work at home business person”! As the marketing person, web master, copy writer, doorway site builder (over 105) , IT Spam Arrester, accountant, advertisement email screener, newsletter publisher, website sales creator, product procurer, customer service supervisor, seminar attendee, R&D developer, AS WELL AS ANYTHING ELSE needed as there are no extra funds to pay for an employee to defray the work load, it is hard to imagine how to increase the cash flow and decrease the hats now on the rack…
A business started part time, growing to full time for husband and wife is very attainable in 10 years, starting with little cash and just hard work, breaking over the $100,000 a year mark is the hurdle with the present formula, of articles, copy, copy, copy while trying to keep body, soul and hat rack satisfied.
Unlike the gurus, the work at home “jugglers” sell real products that have to be delivered by mail or carrier, manage inventory, containers, labels, packing material and OH YEAH, don’t forget the wife’s birthday!
The answer to this mime show, one great philosopher proclaims, is: “That which is most personal, is most general”, I challenge the philosopher to dissect this bony visceral in a week’s worth of blogs, to reveal something of substance the resembles something firmer than jello…
Lost in the crowd
derrill, i can hear your frustration loud and clear. can i ask you if you ever read my internet business manifesto?
i can tell – by what you told me – your currently heading in the wrong direction (sorry). what i mean by that is this: what you think is the solution… what you are currently looking for… if found will only make the problem worse.
before you get even angrier, please read the manifesto (it’s free) and if you read it years ago, then reread it.
i’m sorry you don’t see the value in this post – but i can understand why when taking into account the pressure, overwhelm, and the flurry of activity that makes up your day.
stick with me derrill and i promise things will improve – just keep reading what i’m posting (when you have the time).
Rich
No anger here. I have read the manifesto but will take your advice and read it again. Although my short expose highlighted some of our personal concerns it also heralds the same ruts of other online business owners that we are in contact with.
We have gleaned a number of life altering tips (huge value) from you as well as others. We want to receive correction so our business will be headed in the “right direction” and remain successful and healthy.
We want to learn more “work smarter, not longer hours”.
We are in great expectation, (with steak knives at the ready, and reading glasses in place) thanks for your diligence.
I think Derrill has hit the nail on the head. We’re all too busy to learn how to not be busy and grow our businesses.
Every businessman I know has told me more than once that there business is different, with unique problems not easily understood by outsiders. On a personal level they honestly believe that. But in every case the more general feelings like fear of failure, disappointment, risk and loss is what really holds them back. Solve the fears we all share in general and personal self imposed restraints melt away.
Question: What is the first thing you would do in a service business to transform a culture of “quality customer service” to a the more personal culture of “loving your customer?”
interesting distinction randy – you’re right, every busines owner thinks their business and their problems are unique – and that’s probably another reason what i am going to show you is so powerful.
you’ve got an interesting question there – won’t be able to tie that into this week’s posts – but we’re making that transition in our business right now – so i definitely have some stuff to share
Rich,
Love the direction this blog/ training is going. You rock.
1. The sentence says to me that what I personally struggle with and the biggest concerns/ challenges I have are most likely experienced by many other people out there.
2. One of the things I’d like to know is how to reach people at that emotional level when identifying their problems and presenting the solution. Is it all tied to sales copy…or are there other things we can do?
Thanks.
great ken – point 1 is spot on! and point 2 is something i am definitely going to address this week – stay tuned…
Hi Rich:
Thanks for your post. It gives me a new way to think about the coaching my business partner, Kendra Bonnett, and I do. We work with writers and entrepreneurs who want to tell their personal or professional story.
Specifically, one area we teach is called Theme and Message. A story is unique but it must have a theme, which is universal, and a message, which is the take away or point of the story. We connect with others through the universal elements. They want to read our specific stories because they can apply them to similar areas of their lives, but only if we understand our theme.
I especially like what you wrote in your eight word sentence as I see how we can show the business as well as the writing use of Theme and Message. Great additional depth added from your insights. We always need to connect with our readers/customers. Thanks.
Questions for you:
1. Why do we get “off message” and how can we get back “on message” without beating it to death?
2. Are some themes more universal than others? (You can translate this question into your terminology of personal and general, of course.)
3. Some of the people we work with have a hard time seeing the general (theme in my words) instead of the personal. How do you get others to move beyond the specific/personal in order to promote their story/product/service more effectively?
-Matilda
Some human problems are shared, or close to universal. Some human problems are rare. We cannot know that any problem we may be experiencing is therefore universal. There needs to be a broader framework by which to determine universality vs. uniqueness.
For example I once experienced agoraphobia, a crippling mental problem that plagued me for years. Not everyone experiences this. However the anxiety behind it, and prolonging the problem by my unconscious dialogue, are much more on the universal level.
What has struck me about Rich’s words, thoughts and publications, and I have read most of them in the past few years, certainly since the Manifesto days, is that he is very intuitive, gifted with describing fairly common challenges that are painfully felt by many of us, and posing one or more solutions that are NOT common, but instead offer a new perspective, based on not just common sense but also a higher-level view of the problem, that allows him to point out to us things we had not seen before. A gift not to be taken for granted. A gift not so common. If it was so common we’d all be as rich and famous as Rich.
buck, i am going to do my very best to show you how i do what it is i do. to me it is intuitive, but i’ve been thinking about this for quite some time. and i believe i can now show you how i do it.
and thank you for the kind words.
While it is true that struggles are universal, it is even more significant to realize that all emotions are universal. People want love, joy, peace, happiness and tend to want to avoid fear, anger, depression, etc. Since we all share a common bond of emotions, expressing both those personal struggles and the corresponding emotions, helps us to connect more deeply with our clients and prospects such that they may develop even greater rapport with us. It is that rapport that is the critical element in all success, be it personal or business-related. Greater Rapport = Greater Profits.
Rich, I would like to see a discussion on exactly what types of personal information are most effective in developing rapport in an online business vs. a “bricks-and-mortar” business.
Thanks for all of the magnificent work that you do. Your information is by far the most useful of all of the so-called gurus out there.
All the best,
Dr. Christopher Vogelmann
North Bethesda, Maryland (Washington, DC metro area)
thanks christopher…
i would say there’s no difference whether your business is online or offline – although there is a difference in the medium you use to communicate the message – but we’ll get to that this week
Inherently we are all conditioned by our environment, what we think and say become our reality.
Our “core” “most personal” attributes are that of our ingrained conditioned responses, and we are all on the same planet and are inundated with the same media, etc., so it becomes “general” in context.
We need to come to the understanding that transformation of our limited “conditioned” thinking is our choice to change to become more successful, to “become” that which we speak and then manifest with action.
A portion of Romans 12:2 states it simply, “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.”
I would like to hear your further understanding of these simple yet freeing truths that we sometimes ingore.
Regards,
Michael Zakarian
Rich,
Your wonderful quote:
“That which is most personal, is most general”
actually helped me understand so much better why there has been a firestorm over a recent article titled “Internet Marketing on Life Support
http://www.ryanhealy.com/internet-marketing-life-support/
Ryan Healy felt compelled to name names in examining the “general” question: Are Internet marketing “gurus” just a den of thieves? And is Internet marketing itself now on life support as a result of their unethical business practices?
His respondents replied from the “personal” and related to each other’s negative experiences where people went so far as to name names and provide evidence of their mistreatment.
Again, thanks for insight. I look forward to your next post.
Regards,
Hans
Just had to comment that Healy did follow-up with a request for people to nominate their favorite Internet Marketer:
http://www.ryanhealy.com/nominate-internet-marketer/
And I would like to add my nomination of own Rich Schefren as an outstanding guy in the IM Space! I think you along with Mike Filsaime and Frank Kern represent what being an IM guru is all about.
Keep up the great work, Rich!
–Burt
definitely hans. this is one fo the reasons that ryan’s post has resonated. and i do plan to give my take on the dilemma that ryan, the salty droid, etc.. have surfaced. but that will have to wait till after i am done with this series of posts at the very least.
1-What does the sentence “That which is most personal, is most general.” mean to you?
We are all human beings and have similar situations/challenges (General). When we are born, as a child, we are unaware of any challenges/challenges don’t mean anything. However as we grow up with any challenges, our parents and authority figures in their intention to protect us, educate us, not to complain/talk about our problems. In fact I remember a famous quote-”Don’t Wash your dirty linen in public”. Hence as we grow up we are programmed not to talk about our problems and hence the same situations/challenges (that all human beings face) become personal.
interesting point lalitha. i never thought of that correlation – between not complaining or talking about our problems and the message i am conveying here. i can see how this is just another obstacle to using what i am going to show you.
but, just to make sure – and i’ll be clarifying the point in greater detail in the coming days – i’m not suggesting anyone complains about there problems.
for right now, i am suggesting you get in touch with them, and are able to communicate them in a way that is not autobiographical.
I’ve come to realize that the struggles I face, the ones that I think are unique to me, are actually pretty commonplace. Things like procrastination, fear of failure, fear of success, lack of discipline in certain areas, etc. are certainly things I struggle with, but so does a very large portion of the people I know.
I don’t know if this is the primary gist of what you’re getting at Rich, but I tend to think it goes even deeper than this. I just don’t know how much deeper or how I can apply it to my life personally, and then also professionally as I try to connect with my target market.
In terms of what my question for next time would be, it would to ask for further clarification of this idea. How does it affect me, how can I leverage others to overcome my own personal struggles, and how can I use this information to my advantage to help grow my business?
chestin… you are so close… and i can’t wait to show you how it affects you and you can use it in your marketing to give you and your business an advantage.
Everyone wants to believe that they are unique.
Yet look at the commonality of our goals:
Better finances, more freedom, stronger and more loving relationships, to benefit from a partnership and not be taken advantage of, to be free of limitations that vaguely plague us.
It’s from these common goals that the general issues. “That which is most personal, is most general.” It makes sense.
And what’s so odd is that despite the “general” we seek multitudes of solutions and when the solution is tried (if at all) we often block out own success by saying things like:
* that won’t work here.
*that won’t work for me.
*they are a bunch of thieves.
*I’m stuck and nothing I do will work.
The Bible (yeah, Ecclesiastes (sp?) I think) says there is nothing new under the sun. Except for the multitude of ways to think we are truly unique in our desires, actions, beliefs, and ability to accomplish things in life.
Robert
yes – the sentence can be applied both positively and negatively – very good point robert.
1-What does the sentence “That which is most personal, is most general.” mean to you?
When you show your personality people see, that you are human, just like them. You have your life, need, wants, failures. This is joining us together.
2-What do you want me to focus on tomorrow? What if anything I’ve said today is unclear and you’d like greater clarity on?
How to form inside me empathy on the deepest level. How to feel other people feelings.
“That which is most personal, is most general”
It means that there’s a commonality in all humans. A commonality in conditioning that convinces us that we are all somehow more secure or safe when we keep our deepest pains & discomforts to ourselves.
In doing so, we are also cutting ourselves off from one of the simplest solutions. Confirmation & Awareness. The confirmation of a shared pain brings about a shared awareness and the feeling of acceptance.
Huge amounts of energy & power are generated at the point when a person feels understood and accepted. It’s a powder keg of possibility waiting for the right type of heat to spark it!
In terms of marketing, if we meet people at that Awareness with the right Education, we gain their consent in making them Responsible for taking the right actions to get a different, more favorable result in their life. All we have to do at that point is point them in the right direction.
I like the topic a lot and appreciate you guys speaking on it. Keep it up, I’ll stay tuned.
Thanks
“That which is most personal, is most general.”
Everyone thinks that their problems are unique. They take them in, internalise them and fester on them. They must be unique because if they weren’t they could just find out what someone else did to fix it and do that.
But if you just chunk up enough you always get to a common denominator. And yet this is about marketing, so if you tell them they are not unique they will not believe you and hence not buy the solution. So paradoxically, the more you empathise with them and say their problem is unique then the more likely they are to buy into your solution and the more you can charge for it.
So that is one of the reasons you should always write copy as if you are speaking to one person and avoid generalisations and trivialising the problem.
Wow that got my brain into gear – thanks.
1. “Know thyself” and “The life which is unexamined is not worth living.”- Plato
Unless you can honestly expose (at least to yourself) those trials, tribulations and struggles that are core to your discontent, you’ll never have the necessary empathy to truly persuade others.
By taking the time to find your own core dissatisfactions, not just the symptoms, you empower yourself to expose them in others.
Once someone knows you truly understand them, and more importantly are like them, they will let you lead them to a solution.
2. Rich, I’d like your thoughts on building a business which leverages online presence to drive growth of an offline, face to face, component. In other words using online resources for local business growth.
What does the sentence “That which is most personal, is most general.” mean to you?
Just as many others commented above, to me it means: Our problems are much much more common that what we believe. In fact we believe they are pretty unique.
So if we look at them we are faced with a list of problems that are asking to be resolved – which quickly becomes overwhelming. And we go out looking for solutions. So far is pretty passive and reactive.
As business people, we can pick one (or a few) and try to solve them ourselves and then turn them into a product.
My questions are:
1- How to select THE ONE. The right one for me to solve. In other words: how do I find out which problem is the best candidate to be solved by me? – considering my interests, passions and strengths
2- Many of the problems from the list are in fact on my way – like procrastination, fear, etc. Do I have to find/consume a solution for them first to be able to spend time and energy on THE ONE I will be solving? Seems like a recursive situation? I guess that is why we feel like hamsters in our wheels.
Rich, Thank you very much for the opportunity. This is very valuable. Thanks.
Best,
Kayvon K
kayvon – you’re are so on the right track here…
for question #1 – only you can answer that question – but i’ll certainly give you some guidance (on this) in the days to come
for question #2 – it’s not a vicious circle – you can leave the hamster wheel behind – i’ll show you how this week.
Rich,
Beauty more often than not lies in simplicity. Your sentence, ‘that which is most personal, is most common’ makes a perfect example. The secret of beauty in simplicity lies therein that it is just perfect the way it is. You can’t improve it anymore by adding a single word and you’d dilute it by removing a single word.
Simplicity always implies clarity. The simple truth the 8 words express lies in the fact, that the deeper you dig into yourself, the more you connect with what all people share in common, no matter the age, race, gender, social status, etc. – that which is the whole array of feelings that we all as human beings have.
Smart marketing instrumentalizes this on a psychological level and those who are particularly good at it are the most successful. Who is going to draw the line between true empathy and cold hearted manipulation since only the outcome = profit matters.
walter, thank you for what you said in your first 3 paragraphs…
you’re last paragraph hit a nerve… and it’s one i find myself in a continual struggle to fully comes to terms with.
on this blog, in my reports, and in my products and programs i teach powerful concepts, strategies and tactics. unfortunately they can be used both by the honest and ethical, and by the greedy and sleazy.
i can easily point to stunning examples of both. obviously the first group makes me proud of what i’ve taught. the other group repulses me and makes me feel guilty for enabling them.
i’m still wrestling with this issue – and i’m afraid it’ll most likely haunt me until i stop writing and teaching.
i guess the best answer i have right now is – only your own morals and ethics can tell you the difference, we each have to draw the line for ourselves – and hopefully, we reap what we sow.
1. At our core we all share just a few basic (but essential) needs that we seek to have fulfilled. When we struggle or find ourselves overwhelmed by general problems, the solution can most often be traced back to one of those basic personal needs not being met. To market effectively we must reach deep to touch the very core rather than focus on getting them to buy this today and that tomorrow.
2. Where do we go, search, to find people expressing their desires. And why are the classified ads saturated with people selling things to the masses but when you look at the Items wanted section you see so little?
Looking forward to the dialog this week Rich!
Hi Rich,
Your post strikes a big bell….! Truthfully my personal problem is starting…even though I am an ex-newspaper reporter of years…every time I think about writing a blog that reveals anything about my beautiful life in the Caribbean, I get jittery. So I will start with a less ambitious plan and work up to a great plan…!
Great day to you and your team!
best
vic
Such a powerful statement, Rich, and so very true. I help moms who have struggled with their weight for years finally get the weight off, and the only reason I know how to do this to help them is that I had to change my *own* lifestyle myself first. At the time, I felt SO alone in my struggles, and yet now I know that I most certainly wasn’t the only one out there trying to make the switch. (In fact, I worked in marketing at the time, and yet somehow I hadn’t clued in to the fact that the weight loss industry is so enormous! And it’s huge for a reason!)
It’s funny how we do that as humans, isn’t it? We hole up when we’re scared or in pain of some sort and feel like no one else in the world shares our pain. But I have to say that it’s awesome for those of us entrepreneurial folks who finally see what you said so eloquently, Rich — if we’ve gone through that deeply private, personal pain, so have many, many thousands of others. It’s the human experience at its toughest (and yet its finest too — the tough stuff brings out our true colors, I find). And it’s really rewarding (and I don’t mean financially, though that part’s nice too!) to be able to help others not have to struggle anymore because we know some deeply personal answers that will work for others too.
Thanks for the thought-provoking post!
Cheers,
Jennifer
Rich,
The sentence “That which is most personal, is most general” is referring to the uncertainty that affects us personally and also affects the general population.
It’s a lack of confidence in ourselves & others, what we & others are doing, the products & services we are offered & offering others, politicians & our government, etc.
It affects what we and others will do and are willing to do, etc.
The answer is confidence.
You have to have confidence in yourself & your abilities, confidence in the product or service you are offering, and confidence that the product or service you are offering solves a problem or fills a true need.
Thanks,
Mike M
http://www.earnhigherreturn.com
Ok, I am going to post this before reading what others have said, so here goes…
Both you & Clayton point out how valuable it is to utilize genuine emotions relevant to your target audience and the problems they face. Also how important it is to be genuine and relevant to that audience so that a real connection can be established. So when I look at the challenges being faced by my target audience and the possible solutions that I can bring to the table, if I can make the appropriate personal connection I should be able to connect with the widest audience. That is part of what I see in your sentence, but I am certainly open to a deeper understanding.
Rich, if I remember correctly, you have admitted that it has been hard for you to open up to let more of your personality come forth. I would be interested in hearing more about this struggle, how you have found ways to open up, and how that has been applied to achieving more rewarding business growth. I have been a technocrat for many decades and have made a commitment to change gears. Thanks.
Unemployed and out of money. Would really like to make a living on line. I just need to make $1000 a month to start to pay bills. I have been reading everything I can find but nothing clicks. HELP
That which is most personal is most general.
To me when I read that I think, “Yes, I have some personal things (problems, ideas, desires), but they are pretty general in nature…not so specific.”
For example, let’s say Debbie is overweight and wants to lose some pounds. This is personal to her..but she most likely thinks to herself, “I’m fat, I want to lose weight”…a very general statement. She doesn’t say, “I’m 30lbs over my desired weight. I want to lose 3lbs/week over the next 10 weeks and plan to do so by adding Chinese medicinal foods to my diet and getting my heart rate up for 30 minutes each day doing tai chi.”
That which is personal to Debbie (her desire to lose weight) is pretty general.
Thanks Rich. Looking forward to the next article.
Dr.Pauline Bao
For better or worse, I have had the opportunity to spend a lot of time recently around my aging parents (in their 70s and 80s) and what I have discovered is this: You had better find some way to occupy your time now otherwise TV mighty be all you have to look forward to when you get old. Work on a hobby NOW! Get outside interests NOW! Even if you have kids, when they get older and get out on their own, they won’t want to see you more than a couple of times a year. The big problem I see with an aging population is that they lose mobility (ie., cant drive, cant walk, physically deteriorate) just at the time when they get the most freedom to do stuff. What happens? They plop down on the couch and let the idiot box do the thinking. Which studies have shown may lead to early dementia and alzheimers. So, how does this apply to “That which is most personal is most general?” The quest for meaning in life. The reason you even bother to get out of bed in the morning. We all have to have a reason to live, whether it be quilting or tennis or free climbing or pottery or etc. etc. In old times, gathering food and clean drinking water was enough. Now, if you are reading this post on a computer, chances are figuring out where your next meal is coming from really isn’t that big a deal. The big deal is figuring out how to make it to bedtime without getting hammered while watching “Dancing with the Stars”.
I really liked your post. When I reflect upon the sentence two thoughts come to mind. First off is the Toby Keith song, “I want to talk about me”, and secondly that in marketing when you write sales pieces it should be in the “you” perspective. MY struggles are truly the struggles that others face and conversely “you” share them in general.
The sentence you enlightened us with in your post shows that your own struggles are very much the key to your sales and your materials in many ways if you allow it to be. In the same small manner it can be a double-edged sword if you do not heed to understand it properly.
I have never heard it put quite the way and as simply as you put it. Thank you.
George Sellers
thanks george – and yes, i don’t suggest you present them from the “me” perspective. that’s why i said write it like you were referring to a challenge that your close friends are experiencing.
Hello Rich!
I couldn’t have needed this line of thinking at a more crucial time, as I am in the process of putting two very large entities together and just want to get through to both parties appropriately.
1. I think that what you mean is that when we get right down to it, the universal feelings and needs such as love, unity, respect, those types of things are what we hunger for, as individuals, which is what all corporations are made of. So we need to truly investigate our audience and cater to that part of what their needs are, and communicate that very SIMPLY and to the point, without the rhetoric. and
2. I would really like to know what it would cost to get you or Jay to personally mentor me once I get this going. I believe that I am a great and creative networker and would love more intense training on how to set new joint ventures up properly!
1.
I used to think that I was trapped in my personal (family-related, societal, economic etc.) circumstances. I was a Turkish student (educated in Turkey) in a Political Science Ph.D. program in the United States.
The requirements of the program were very rigid, and applying them verbatim would MAKE SURE that I would NEVER be able go where I wanted to be the most at that time: A well published political scientist at a top research university who works on questions that matter the most and who gets very solid, compelling results.
So, almost involuntarily, I deeply desired to start over, and apply to top-notch Ph.D. programs that would give my PREPARED MIND the best opportunities and the best resources in my endeavor. It would take me at least three years longer, but the results would be splendid!
Still, that would automatically mean accepting that you failed in your current Ph.D. program. And FAILURE was not something I was accustomed to. I had succeeded in every scholarly effort that I had attempted so far (like learning English in one year from scratch at the age of 18, and then graduating from a college that teaches Political Science in English in Turkey with the highest honors)
To make the matters worse, the guys who fail in graduate school almost always move on (in a crestfallen way) to do things that are much much less satisfying and rewarding. And I think that is actually THE DARK SIDE OF “THAT WHICH IS MOST PERSONAL IS MOST GENERAL” That is to say, you find out that your personal circumstances, problems are indeed quite general. But still, you find it out in a very DISHEARTENING, DEBILITATING way. All you see are people who share comparable sets of problems, and they are just unable to surmount them: they give up on their dreams.
Thank God I am a very persistent, die-hard type of guy. It was exactly at that point that I started doing AGGRESSIVE SELF-HELP READING. And then I found the LIGHT SIDE OF “THAT WHICH IS MOST PERSONAL IS MOST GENERAL”. That was very HEARTENING AND ENABLING!
I hadn’t seriously thought about it until then, but every truly successful guy, from Edison to Ford, from Andrew Carnegie to Napoleon Hill, from Clement Stone to Rockefeller, from Brian Tracy to Rich Schefren had more than their fair share of obstacles, problems, and difficulties. What set them apart was their PERSISTENCE, their indomitable will to find out and apply the ways to overcome any obstacle that stands between them and what they want. They were truly convinced that if there was a way, they would make sure to find it out. They all had achieved their successes from scratch. FAILURE in ANYTHING meant only one thing to them: THE OPPORTUNITY TO START OVER, MORE INTELLIGENTLY! For these guys, failure was as natural as breathing in and breathing out. What wasn’t natural anymore was letting failure stop them trying their best. They were all following more or less a dictum like that: “I’ve failed over and over and over and over in my life. And that’s precisely why I succeed.”
Then I told myself “I am very very very persistent too. And I hate obstacles. I would do anything to overcome ANY OBSTACLE between me and my meaningful, satisfying end. So why not follow the WONDERFUL TRAIL THAT THEY BLAZED?”
Now I’m on my way. And that’s what “that which is most personal is most general” means to me.
2.
Rich, I’ve learned it fully well that you can’t help anyone in anything unless they first decide to help themselves. They need to first make up their minds to be receptive to your suggestions.
So what do you usually do to facilitate your prospects to first decide to help themselves? I’m very very curious about it and I’d be very thankful if you share your strategy and tactics on that.
Thanks,
Emre
We’re all in this together… Misery loves company… We have no problems here, only opportunities… We all have two arms, two legs, a head a neck and a torso…
Our problems don’t make us special, they are ordinary. In the ordinary can be found the opportunity to join together to rise above.
My question, “how do you inspire greatness, when nothing less than greatness will do?” (hint: the movie script for Invictus.)
1 – This sentence seems the same as another saying I’ve heard before: “The personal is political.” I do believe it is true. It means what you already said, that the thing that drives you personally is not your own private problem, it is related to what others are experiencing, and in recognizing that you are not alone in facing it, you can help not only yourself but also others as well, and this is part of what it means to serve. We are all here to serve others in some way. It means “How do I serve?” It means “How do I make a pearl out of my own issue and show others how to do it too?” It also points to seeing that what you are passionate about, others will be too, if you trust and believe in your passion. First, you must recognize your passion (which is intimately connected with your “problem” or “challenge” or whatever it is that you are interested in solving). Second, you must open yourself up to finding a creative way to turn it into a service that makes the world a better place. No doubt, others have your same passion/problem/challenge. By turning it into a pearl, and showing others how to do it too, by being a living example of it and translating your passion into effective communication, you can turn it all into a great business—one that is actually needed in the world.
2 – Tomorrow, I’d like you to focus on some suggested action steps for making the “pearl.” How do I get my oyster to start producing it? I know you might be asking yourself, “Well, what kind of pearl are you looking to create?” I can describe it to you. I just don’t quite understand the process I need to implement in order to cultivate it.
Hi Rich,
You know, all our lives we are taught about how different and unique we are.
When I think about the statement you have made, it actually conflicts with that teaching. I have to consider that there is alot of commonality and connectedness with myself and others.
Why are we taught to just think of our own uniqueness and never how interconnected we all are?
Thanks
Hi Rich -
Thank you very much for all the energy, intensity, creativity, and passion you put into this and all your training!
I’m definitely in the category of, “How is it that so many others are making money in this online marketing thing, but all I’m doing is racking up debt!?”
Here are my thoughts on your questions:
1-What does the sentence “That which is most personal, is most general.” mean to you?
To be honest, I don’t have any more clever an answer that has already been posted above. Which is to say I agree that my most personal struggles, concerns, curiosities, interests, and passions do feel like things that are all too often unique to me. Meaning, no one I know experiences these things as I do.
Yet I agree with the many other people who posted comments that as we open up and bare our souls to others …surprisingly… there are occassionally others who say, “HEY!! THAT’S MY STORY TOO!! THAT’S EXACTLY HOW I FEEL !!” = -)
…which is an amazing bonding experience.
2-What do you want me to focus on tomorrow? What if anything I’ve said today is unclear and you’d like greater clarity on?
Tomorrow please focus on how beginners like me can use these emotions to help others identify with me. Then after they identify with me, help me to know the type of progression I need to take with them to help them see the value in my products. Then of course close the deal.
Thanks again!
First of all, thank you for doing this, Rich. I’m a guy that typically wouldn’t comment on a blog if I see the same sentiments as my own already expressed. But I do think it’s important to leave feedback, particularly when it’s being asked for directly, with the idea of truly tailoring your comments to the feedback you receive.
Plus, I feel like I’ve learned a ton from your blog posts already, that really this is the least I can do.
So for what it’s worth, here it is:
I think that each of us (human beings) live in our heads a lot, so that most of the time we think our experiences are unique only to ourselves. And to some degree that’s true. But because we are human beings, I think that there are some universal truths (or wants or needs) that we’re all striving for. And I think it’s that journey that we all have in common. And I guess when thinking about empathizing with your customers, it’s those experiences from that journey that we all have in common, and that’s what we can tap into when interacting with our customers.
However, empathizing with customers to only “make the sale” is not true empathy. I think that your product or service has to be a good fit for your customer, and if it doesn’t, then you have an obligation to walk away.
Anyway, I look forward to your response tomorrow. Keep up the great job!
Great series and concept, looking forward to reading more of it. (i don’t feel like writing about the 2 questions now :P
I used to truly believe I was unique, a ‘one of a kind’ individual, but the older I’ve gotten I have come to the realization that I am not. My problems, desires, wishes, aspirations, dilemmas, issues, set backs, insecurities, losses, tribulations, health issues, and loves are not unique. I’ve discovered that we all go through the nearly identical issues at some time during our lives, some sooner or later than others. Don’t most everyone want the same things in life : love, happiness, wealth, health, family, friends, freedom, and time to enjoy all these things? You notice that I said ‘most everyone’ as there are individuals that are not ‘wired’ quite right, therefore live under a totally different code of conduct. The ones I want to associate with and be aligned with are just like me, not at all unique. There I said it ! It took me many years to think and say that.
All that being said, speaking from the heart, from that true and pure location, to share and reciprocate all that makes us better. To truly know that what you speak and teach is the right path, and to openly look to others for the same. Truth and guidance.
For tomorrow, discussion of sincerity.
Great post.
As that great philosopher , Yogi Berra, once noted : “when you come to the fork in the road, take it”. Ain’t that the truth.
Hi Rich,
Love the way you worded the preframe in this post…well done.
I only this morning had a meeting with a young memeber on my team…she is facing a confidence issue as per how you stated “that which is most personal is most general”. I am going to send her this link and see what happens.
You can be sure I read all your following posts as I too am working on creating a much more meaningful dialogue with my subscribers…the good thing in some aspects is that my new blog only has 2 posts…no baggage to work around.
Waiting in great anticiaption.
John
http://www.yourtravelplanners.com
That sentence can have many meanings for different people but for me it means that my personal struggle is something I know intimately and since I got to know my problems I may know more than a lot of people who have the same problem or struggle.
If that is the case how can I turn that knowledge into an opportunity to help those people and how can I reach them, build credibility and serve them?
Thanks Rich. you have the ability to make people think in ways they never even considered. Just stirring the old gray matter in this way already means a lot to me.
Hi Rich,
I have been listening to the New Beginnings section within the Maven Home Study course over the past couple of days. You make a comment where you said that solving your own problems is what helped you.
Therefore, my take on the sentence is that even though we all feel that our problems are unique to us, they are in fact a problem that everyone faces and if you can solve your problem and move yourself closer to your goal, then you have in fact created a solution that millions of others also have and will gladly pay money for or give their attention to.
So, if you know your own problems well enough you will always have a way to grow your business.
Thanks,
Graeme.
Rich… If you can simply show us step by step, the practical -HOW to- of extracting a target audience’s deepest problems/struggles AND emotions… you’ll be a champion all over again. lol
Totally agree. One reason why I can connect with many people face-to-face once I really start talking is that I talk about my personal struggles and people start to see themselves reflected in me. That gives them permission to connect with their own personal pain as well. :)
Oliver did already “nail it” in terms of the clear meaning of the quote, so apparently you have some additional point related to marketing, but the “great truth” one discovers by participating in really open and intense “group therapy” (for years, and years, and years) is that everyone’s “problems” are the same, we lose sight of that fact when the problems are our own, and therefore they look insurmountable. It is always easier to see a logical and reasonable solution to someone else’s problem. Resisting giving the advice until asked for it is the hard part.
It seems to me that since most people want to not only get but also keep customers (it is far more difficult and expensive to attract a new customer and get them to commit to the buying process, than to entice a customer back again) that we want to develop real relationships with customers/clients. But it seems that gaining their trust is the key to unlocking the door to deeper relationships and how do you do that if you don’t have a pocket full of references and personal recommendations from past customers/clients?
Dear Rich,
I’ve been reading nearly all your reports and have found them an outstanding collection, really helpful and even inspiring! Because of that that i decided to give Internet Marketing a try.
About your sentence, someone said above that it sounds conflicting to what we’re taught throughout our lives. I say it’s complementing. We all have such a duality. Public life and Private life. Right and Left. Masculine and Feminine.
I also say that empathy without knowledge is a flower without petals. It serves no purpose.And knowledge without empathy is a blind sword. There cinism is born. And it can affect nearly anyone in a bad way.
And I think we are here just to learn a bit more and enlighten our prospects.As one man once said:”The person who lights a candle to others, enlightens him/herself first.”
And, Rich, I’d love to learn a bit more about how to gently deal with prospects, yet in a professional way.
Keep up the good work.
Thanks a lot.
Here’s a comment for you…
Rich,
You know what’s funny? I completely believe everything you are teaching us. But the weird thing is, sometimes I think it is NOT beneficial to me to realize others have the same struggle. I WANT to be unique, different, even special.
That is one of the reasons I love listening to you live, in your materials, blogs and even that 26 hour marathon- it felt like you were just talking to me! And isn’t that the proverbial “Silver Bullet” in marketing?
I want to feel like everyone else in the room is just taking up space and the speaker is connecting with me….rather than I am in a group of people all sharing the same frustrations and problems. Even if I am delusional, sometimes I like it that way :)
I guess I am alone on this…bummer.
Teddy
teddy, as a prospect you are not alone, but you can think you are and it won’t change anything…
But, as a marketer you want your prospects to feel the same “like you are just talking to each one individually” so you MUST realize that you’re NOT alone.
make sense, teddy?
Rich,
Wow…yes, I am starting to see it quite clearly.
The better I relate to my prospect/potential customer and realize our shared problems, the better I am able to provide a solution for them, as it would be just as beneficial to me. Why? Because it is both very ‘personal’ and ‘general’.
So I must realize this, which will motivate me to GET IT DONE and make a difference in their lives, and my sales(and life :) )
Nice Rich…really counter-intuitive but perfect.
Teddy
Rich,
“That which is most personal is most general.” At first, to be honest with you, I was not certain if you were right about this. After all, I struggle with the technological side of Internet Marketing, e.g., putting up websites, etc. But not everyone does, some people are great with the technology.
And then it hit me: you are right about this and in fact you embody this truth. What I am talking about, of course, is the Internet Business Manifesto, which has played a very large role in your online success. When I first read the Manifesto, I had been looking into Internet Marketing for approximately a year, had bought my first IM product, but still was pretty clueless, which I realized deep down in my being, but could not articulate. But then the Internet Business Manifesto articulated it for me. I could see the reason for my confusion: there were just too many disciplines and too much to learn to be successful on my own, especially with and Opportunity mindset. Obviously, the Manifesto was articulating the reality not only that I faced, but that everyone else was facing and thus it went viral. It was very powerful for me, and it produced my current policy: if Strategic Profits has a product out there, I buy it if at all possible.
Thanks, Rich, for this current reminder of this important truth.
Curt Siemers
“That which is most personal, is most general”
Like many of the above comments I have taken a long time ( almost 50 years) to realize that my problems/wants/desires are not unique.
I’ve been brought up to believe that my issues are private, and noone else’s business. Similarly it wasn’t the done thing to pry in to other people’s problems, they would confide in you if they wanted to. Consequently noone ever really shares any problem with anyone else.
Age has helped me understand that we don’t need to reinvent the wheel every time we encounter difficulty.
This promises to be a really interesting series of posts.
Thanks Rich
Phil
“That which is most personal, is most general”
What is experienced by one is experienced by many. Other people have experienced the struggles and challenges we have known in life. Also, the emotions we experience are shared by all. We all have experienced frustration, sadness, joy, love, etc.
Rich – Can you talk about how to find one’s passion and thus one market on the internet? Als, you have mentioned the Theory of Constraints (TOC) in one of your free publications. Can you talk some about TOC, how you were exposed to TOC, its possible uses in marketing, and how you were able to learn and apply TOC.
JUST AN FYI…
THE FOLLOW UP POST TO THIS ONE IS….
http://www.strategicprofits.com/blog/greater-empathy-greater-rapport-greater-profits/
1-What does the sentence “That which is most personal, is most general.” mean to you?
When you acknowledge, be witness to, your pains (the personal) you will be able to write, speak and live from the place of your prospects.
When you truly go to that place of pain and transition through, you will find a solution to offer your prospects. (the general audience)
2-What do you want me to focus on tomorrow?
How do you communicate the benefits of your solution so your prospect understands the value when the solution speaks to their personal objectives versus their strategic business objectives?
“That which is most personal, is most general.” What this means to me has to do with an area of study called “Ontology” – that is, the study of human beings and how they are at their essence.
So the above sentence refers to the universality of feelings, doubts, fears, joys, etc. It’s about how we’re all wired pretty much the same way when it comes down to the nitty gritty. Whatever we’re feeling is not private or proprietary to us – many people are feeling it, either now, in the past or they will feel. What makes us different is how we deal with it.
Rich,
A most thought provoking sentence “That which is most personal is most general”.
I have to disagree with those above who think we are not unique. Each and every one of us is unique in our own way because of our parents, where we were born, how we were raised, etc.
What is not unique is that we all have many very “personal” feelings, wants, needs, and experiences that often create pain and suffering for us. As long as we keep these things bottled up, we never come to the realization that just about every one of our personal problems has been experienced by someone else. It is not until we start sharing our problems or trying to help someone else work through their problems that we realize how “general” our problems really are.
The trick seems to be in digging deep enough and being honest enough with yourself to identify those problems, find a solution and being persistent enough to apply the solution and overcome the problem. Sometimes, I think that just by sharing your problem, you find the solution staring you right in the face!
I have been stumbling over this “sharing” problem for a year now, and still haven’t been able to commit to a particular problem to build around because I don’t feel passionate about any of them and I am unclear as to how I can really help someone else since I am not an expert in any of them except in my own experience.
I really need to know what guidelines I should use to choose which subject to pursue and then how to develop it so that others would be interested enough to keep coming back.
Thanks Rich for your great post.
Karen
Rich,
“That which is most personal, is most general”. I totally understand what you mean and it is so true. Everyone has problems, personal problems which they might not talk to others about except with their closest friends and family. And this is of course the key to empathy and getting down to the root cause of their problems and desires. That’s the key. What is the root cause to their concerns? If you can feel empathy with your market and verbalize how they feel, you connect.
Love your work and what you do, Rich (old member of the original GPS, here ;) still struggling with procrastination though, changing habits is hard.
Chris
My first thought was that Rich was wondering how come he’s not making as much money as other internet marketers?
really, are you kidding ryan… i do quite well thank you…
My personal thought on sentence reflect deep personal frustrations in an individual and which is more of a problem to many.
Personally i have information overload that has affected me for the last one year and I don t know how to do away with it and i consider as personal to me though i now many others have same problem.
I must say that opening up such a query will help many. The most difficult personal inner frustration in my internet marketing has been lack of success for the last 1 year. It really bit me seeing other people succeed while i stagnate, not traffic success, no sales loses along the tarmac!. This is personal and general I am not alone.
exactly peter! and those frustrations and disappointments open the door to hyper-effective marketing. many people have told me i’ve done an exceptional job of addressing both of the issues you surface with the “uncertainty syndrome” and the “internet business manifesto”.
But don’t lose hope, cause believe it or not – we’ve all been there (myself included). here’s the horrible road i went down before things turned around for me….
1 – I Was Unsure Which Marketing Tactics To Use
2 – I Started Wasting More + More Of My Life Online
3 – I Began To Frantically Looking For What’ll Work
4 – I Suffered From Severe Information Overload
5 – I Founde Everything Ended Up More Difficult & Less Effective Than I Had Hoped
6 – I Got Seduced Into Buying Magic Pills
7 – I Never Got The Results I’d Hoped For (or was promised)
8 – I Started To Question What’s Wrong With Me
9 – I Felt Like I Was Disappointing My Family
I don’t know where on the path you are – but know this: I needed to go through it all to be where i am today – and i’m not bs’ing you on that. if there’s a reason why i am able to write about the challenges of internet marketing so well it’s because i traveled down this depressing, isolated (or at least it felt that way) path myself and still have all my journals where i continually vented my frustrations and worked through what i needed to change.
i really hope this helps – and i really hope you come back to read this
Self Doubt Starts Seeping In
Thanks for sharing your personal challenges Rich.
This is a beautiful example of what “That which is most personal, is most general” really means.
What is clear from the value you’re providing to your readers, both in these posts, and in your attention to reading and replying to our comments, is your compassion and integrity.
I’ll bet that has come because of your challenges, not in spite of them.
Great series! Thanks!
Loving this new series of blog posts which are very timely for me so thank you all for your comments as well as Rich’s post.
I built one of my businesses, The Money Gym by following the advice of one of my mentors Chris Barrow who said “let your arse hang out in public, some will kick it but most will admire you for it” and by blogging my own wealth creation challenges, the search for solutions, how I felt about it all, and my list grew and grew and grew with people who, when I offered products/coaching programmes to solve the problems I had experienced, bought happily and enjoyed / contributed.
However, as I started working with business partners I liked and respected a lot, and after a couple of years they told me they were uncomfortable with me sharing a lot of my personal challenges – they said they “cringed” when they read my “Note from Nicola” every week. I should rein it in, tone it down, not knowing if they were right but believing in their wisdom I agreed we should invite others to write and that I should just take a turn occasionally.
I felt upset and confused because, surely, that was how I built the business in the first place?
Now the economy has changed and, for many reasons, we have decided to put The Money Gym into auto-running mode while we each pursue our own projects. I’m going to write my second book, perhaps fulfil my dream of going to live in Greece while I do it, and I’m going to get much more into “pure” internet income streams such as creating info-products, pro-blogging and affiliate marketing the stuff I love and use.
What a feeling of freedom now that I can blog again on NicolaCairncross.com and say whatever I like and share whatever I’m thinking/feeling.
Or should I? I’ve always written in the first person (being a star/creator profile in Wealth Dynamics terms LOL) except when I’ve been relating an incident with others who may not want to be identified……and I’ve been pondering on that point and so, when I read the comments on your blog posts (almost as good as the posts themselves) I picked up on these two gems…so thank you for bothering to respond to the comments, Rich.
“for right now, i am suggesting you get in touch with them, and are able to communicate them in a way that is not autobiographical”
and
“i don’t suggest you present them from the “me” perspective. that’s why i said write it like you were referring to a challenge that your close friends are experiencing”
Perfect! I can reach in and feel the feelings which are “personal but general”, but not expose myself so much, so publically, while sharing what helps and what works for me again.
I feel a blog post coming on!
Nicola
can’t wait to read it nicola – i used to read your posts at the moneygym – so i look forward to seeing what you come up with…
i also find i can have the greatest impact when i write about struggles – especially when i can provide a pathway through them. i’m sure you feel the same.
I read about folks that seem to have faced bigger problems than I have and they still succeeded. So I go at it and don’t succeed. Therefore my problem must be unique and becomes personal.
For me the statement says that at the core, we all have personal issues and while the apparent circumstances we face may be different, the obstacles we encounter are pretty common to us all.
I also see why those marketers who haven’t actually “walked their talk” would find it difficult to relate to their audience’s frustrations. Like a college professor who’s never been outside the academic world trying to teach a business class.
I’d like you to touch upon the importance of having personally struggled with the same issues that your prospect is struggling with if you’re marketing a solution to those issues.
al, to answer your question – i don’t think it’s necessary for you to have struggled with the same issues, but it absolutely helps.
especially in this day and age – where being an expert who blogs puts a heavy burden on serving up a lot of content on a continual basis. if you don’t have the experience often times the pseudo-experts run out of the things to say.
Hi Rich,
Trying to catch up with your blogs in this series.
Interesting stuff!
To answer your question: 1-What does the sentence “That which is most personal, is most general.” mean to you?
Basically all human problems are similar even though we think our situation is unique. However, this also explains why cold reading is so easy to do to people and why the “mind reading” and psychic hotline folks do such swift business.
To answer question 2-What do you want me to focus on tomorrow? What if anything I’ve said today is unclear and you’d like greater clarity on?
Even though all human problems are similar in nature, each person’s situation is unique and the one size/one solution fits all rarely works effectively over the long term because on two people process info the same way or even understand the same set of facts the same way: witness the unreliability of two witnesses to the same car accident & neither is accurate when the videotape is reviewed.
So, what do I hope you focus on? Gonna have to go with
hoping you show us how you move from generic problems of the many and drill down into actually making a significant difference for the individual.
Might be a bit much to ask from a simple blog series but if anyone can do it…I’m putting my money on YOU :)
Cheers!
Michael
In view of this statement after the previous questionable (?) post, I first thought that possibly asking a string of personal questions such as you did might apply to most of the viewers or at least most of the viewers might relate to them. I see that a series of questions could pique the viewer’s interest to be followed by a series of benefits leading to a call to action.
Sounds like a good sales page to me even though it doesn’t follow conventional teaching. May be more effective.
hey michael you are sooo spot on… in fact i have some books on cold-reading (unread unfortunately), and dan kennedy mentioned using some of the cold reading tools are great copywriting techniques.
to answer your question – i think it’s about how you go about describing the problem and what you point to as the cause – when you start bringing those 2 elements into the equation, then you make your propspects feel – HEY THIS GUY GETS ME!
Communicating authentically about your journey creates trust with customers. However trust is also developed with honest intent, capabilities that match your intention and the ability to react with integrity whilst delivering results (Speed of Trust-Stephen Covey)
My personal interpretation of your quote is that the feeling of community through shared struggle brings us closer.
As a customer, a coach and a marketer I feel that our results personally and externally revolve around our ability to listen reflectively to ourselves as well as others. If we actually reflect what we hear, not what we interpret through a goal orientated outcome (more sales) the path becomes clear.
This leads to asking Why questions (heart) not How questions (head).
My 5 cents
i like your 5 cents justin!
and you’re right. it does increase the feeling of community.
The sentence means to me that we are more alike than different, sorta like nobody is unique, in general.
I can’t say what you should focus on cause you already wrote the post, I’m a late comer, but…If I had read this post when it was new I would have asked you to focus on how to truly stop wasting time in your business and really get down to business.
thanks for commenting andrew – and i will be writing about that soon – so stay tuned.
To me it means that what we personally feel is also felt the same or close to it by our peers and we just don’t realize it. We haven’t communicated to each other.
I’d like to hear about more effective communication.
Thank you for continuing to provide great insight.
you’re spot on greg – and that can be ethically used in marketing in a BIG way.
thanks for the compliment and the comment
rich
Your article is very helpful, especially that we’ve just started on our own “internet” biz. I look forward to learning more from you, and in advance, I thank you for our imminent success!
May your tribe continue to flourish and be a continuing inspiration to us!
“That which is most personal, is most general” means we are never alone in our struggles/difficulties. There’s just people waiting to “exhale” with you, then, there goes your “community” instantaneously! What you said, is just a simple truth.
Again, thank you and may you never tire of “bright ideas” to share with us!
Cheers to our mutual success!
and cheers to your future success to louie!
do you know what niche you’ll be focusing on?
Rich it’s easy for you to do what you do because you are already there. How can we do what you want us to do if we haven’t achieved your level of success.
Paul
thanks for commenting paul
what i don’t think you (and many others) realize is that it’s the same thing that got me here – you see, i’m not selling businesses in a box even though i never used one (like many others).
i got to my current status, and my current success – by giving away great content that ultimately led to a lot of sales – and understanding this sentence was a huge factor in me becoming successful – hope that clarifies it.
Aloha from Hawaii.. my interaction with your post and the comments that have followed has caused a reaction within me. And that is the point. by asking a question you have been able to generate reponses, a series of reactions that are both specifically personal/individual and at the same time somewhat generalizable(is that a word?)
All of us are individually distinct but we share some commonalities in our emotional reactions to things, events, stimulus, writings, videos etc etc.
What I chose to love may be my son, my athletics, my activities or anything else that may be unique to me but the emotion or feelings may be similar to those that others feel towards something else in their universe. It is kind of like we are each individually our own solar systems and our preferred emotional planets are orbiting us. Your planet may be entirely different than my own. The circumstances, the specifics are different but my emotional attachment may be exactly identical to one that you have to something different.
So how do I get specific with you? By focusing my story and my dialogue about the emotions or feelings that my audience shares with me. We can both experience the commonality if I can craft my telling well and in a voice you find familiar.
If you find the telling compelling we can establish a rapport and you may find yourself interested in my recomendations.
yes stan… especially this point…
“By focusing my story and my dialogue about the emotions or feelings that my audience shares with me. We can both experience the commonality if I can craft my telling well and in a voice you find familiar.”
good job – you are on the right track – and aloha right back at ya!
Rich,
The following is my impression from your expression:
“Most general” could also be translated as “Universal”
“Most personal” could be translated as “Change” (as in the constant flurry of personal changes each one of us face moment to moment)(I know the important changes that I face are very personal-not to be confused with “private”)
Therefore, Change is Universal
Why this recognition is important is because through it we can become empowered to be proactive towards constant change by preparation (status quo is an illusion)
that’s an interesting perspective david – that’s why i love to know what other get from my writing cause that wasn’t what i had in mind when i wrote it – but i totally see your point – so good job!
the question i have for you – how can you use your observation in marketing?
Because we are all human and we all suffer from fear, anger, grief, doubt and aloneness.
In saying that we also can all experience joy, love, peace, fulfillment and contentment.
Our problems can become solutions to someone elses’ pain. Journeying through the darkness that someone else is experiencing will always give empathy and understanding.
When you know someone elses’ pain; you also know a possible solution. You can talk when you have walked.
It takes courage to stand up and walk your talk…
Please share your journey into the light :-)
Arohanui (big love)
Jacqui
i love what you have written jacqui – good job – i checked out your site and found it very inspiring too – you certainly are a good writer
it sounds like this message (what you said) is right up your alley in what you do – so you probably didn’t learn anything new here – but you might in some of my other posts – thanks for the comment – and keep up the good work that you do, because the world certainly needs it!
This is a very powerful sentence we all have a shared commonalty of experience ie the economy the job market the strength of our Nation our Democracy our very way of life. The Entrepreneurial spirit that has made our country the greatest place on earth where every person has the potential to earn commensurate with their efforts.
Our hearts are large our compassion knows no bounds we as a people are used to being Free and the world has long looked to us as a bastion of Freedom. We are a Great people who work hard and suffer the slings and arrows of the world and in so doing absorb the problems associated with that Global experience ie World hunger,tyrants,communism, despots,critics that in some instances owe us their very existence to voice their criticisms.
Your words fall on thirsty ears to enliven my interest in Business; how to make mine more profitable and therefore enable me to give more back ie taxes and tything.
This is the ultimate to learn especially someone who is not wealthy enough to attain higher education through University.
Robert Fargo
Very good point and I haven’t thought about it in that light. Thanks for the new distinction!
What that sentence means to me is that you have to take the opportunity to put yourself in the position of the person with the problem. By doing that you can understand it and solve it for them.
I’m starting a blog. I want to use it as a market research tool. Once I get some feedback then I will know what my potential customers want and what services and products I should be developing to solve their problems.
My website is finding two audiences. One audience is looking for education. The other is looking for the solution to their problems with the services and products that I provide. I’m hoping to get the chance to get feedback from both of these.
I’d like to know more about the system that you use to gather and analyse the phrases in the responses to your blog posts and how you interpret the data to develop new products.
We are all deluded.
We think we’re “special” (how many times did your momma TELL you you were special?), that no one else is as messed up, that no one could possibly like us or understand us if they knew the depths of our “brokenness”.
What a revelation to learn that everyone else, from the most successful to the bum on the street, has the same self-doubts and insecurities! Yet, we live life crippled by our delusion that no one would like us if they knew us, that no one else could understand us.
What a blessing it is to meet someone who knows and empathizes with our mental machinations. We’ll share EVERYTHING with them. (Often times we MARRY them!)
How to be that person for other people, without using it to manipulate and SELL them something? There’s the rub.
It’s almost as if you have to (dare I say the word?) LOVE them!
I think it means what problems that we are having now personally are also experienced by many others and that’s what we share in common. If one is able to find solution to this common problem, it’s easier for them to get buyers for their product, because there are many people who share the same problem would like to find solution to the problem.
Everyone, from the floor sweeper to the executive on the top floor have a different “fear” inside about whatever someone is presenting.
Feel, identify, acknowledge, and then ease those fears with everyone involved from the bottom to the top and you will get the business.
Ease fear, objections disappear, and the price of your product vs. your competition does not matter.
After “pounding the turf” for nearly 40 years I am here to transform my slow and limited “turf” process to an internet process.
My questions:
How do you develop and plan the “process” to identify and address the individual fears when you are not there to verbally and/or physically identify and address them?
What is the process to transfer your friendly personality and warm smile that gets you past the executive’s “gatekeepers” on to the internet?
I am seconding the first Comment by “Thomas” – very clearly expressed –so why not use what I like?
I resonate with the line or statement and how it relates to me is that if we speak from our hearts, our truth, our love and our pain, others will always understand because at that level we have all had the same experiences. We have all been there, we have all lost a loved one, felt the joy of success, see new life join us on this planet, know what it feels like to fall and yearned for the joy of connection.
Go deep and we are all their together. Our soul connection is undeniable. We share the same air and we feel each other’s pain whether we want to admit it or not.